Pretty slight, right?
Seriously, though, today the thought, "is she smoking crack?" passed through my mind a time or two.
First, I let my 4 year old play with the camera today while I was prepping some veggies. She captured a few shots that I frankly thought were great photography for a little one! I proudly posted her work on facebook, and was shocked at how many comments I got from friends and family about how I look. Works like "tiny", and "thin" kept showing up. Words that have never in my life been associated with me.
Here's the shot that garnered so much attention:
(pretty good for 4, right?!?!)
Later in the afternoon, a lady I've only talked to online stopped by to pick up some clothes I am selling. She told me she was worried about buying from me, because "I looked at some of your pictures on facebook, and you looked so tiny, I figured there was no way the clothes would fit me!"
Um, wait....... WHAT!?!?
I think sometimes I'm so overwhelmed by numbers related to my journey (highest weight 420, lost 170, regained almost 60, restart weight loss at 310. 78 lost again. 70 to go, etc., etc., etc) that I lose sight of what IS. I tend to think of myself as much heavier. I know I'm not thin, but I'm also not where I once was. So I forget that people who aren't seeing me day to day (or who have never met me) don't see me with the same baggage-filled filter with which I see myself.
I think I'm going to work on seeing myself with out that filter. I'm going to work on challenging the voice in my head that tells me how far I have to go rather than how far I've come. Besides... that voice in annoying. (No worries... I'm not psychotic. It's a figurative voice, not a literal one). I've always been a 'glass 1/2 empty' kind of girl. Maybe it's time to be a 'glass 1/2 full' type.
I'll work on it.
And just because turn about is fair play....
... I had to take one of her working in the kitchen too. (We were making oatmeal-raisin cookies).