Saturday, January 26, 2013
I learned something else about myself this week. I made a mistake at work, which was pointed out to me. I was so upset! It was a scheduling error, and I had to go back and redo next week's schedule, which I was afraid would make my coworkers upset.
But I realized the reason I was so upset was just that I had made a mistake. I had spent a lot of time making the schedule and all that time was wasted, because now I had to spend more time to fix it. I was way more upset than the mistake warranted and I couldn't get over it.
A few days later, I was telling a friend about my emotional experience and had a revelation--it was because of my dad! My dad hated it when we did something wrong and had to go back and redo it. He hated it at his work and he hated it at home. No matter what we were doing, he expected us to do it right the first time. So even as an adult, I expect it of myself. And its RIDICULOUS! There is no way to do everything right every time!
So I forgive myself for making a mistake and having to redo the schedule. And I forgive myself for everything else I didn't do right the first time, this week and forever. Life is full of mistakes and our job is to learn from them and become the best person we can. That is a much better goal than expecting perfection.