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    THERIN52   4,615
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Frustrated with my family!!


Wednesday, January 23, 2013

So today I checked out another calorie counting website as I had heard that they show you the calorie deficit and all, like how much I eat vs. how much I exercise (still donít quite understand and would like to know how much I actually need to burn during the day without going over board and not losing weight because I am not eating enough to compensateÖitís all so confusing!) Anyways this other site seemed to tell me that if I eat 1360 calories a day mixed with the sedentary work day (desk job) I have that I should lose 2bls a week.. I kept playing with my exercise part of it and that didnít change anything even if I do cardio for an hour or just 40 minutes or none at all it seems that it said the same thingÖ Does this seem right??? I enjoy spark way more as I love the community it isnít just a state of the art web page but itís an actual colorful diverse community or family rather and it is amazing to be a part of. Back to my point it seems this other site is strictly going off of calories restriction not compensating for how much calorie burning I am doing.. Iím still rather confused on this one.

In other news I am struggling with family right now, see both my parents are diabetics (well one is pre with no meds and the other is on a medication not insulin) I guess they see it as not that bad.. The problem being is this upsets me because they arenít taking care of themselves my mom was talking about making all these healthy changes albeit small changes but thatís awesome little change is better than no change. She was just talking about getting into gear this last week and I come over to their house last night and my dad is making homemade smothered in cheese backed macaroniÖ. SeriouslyÖare you kidding meÖ now I am not one to force my habits or beliefs on others but in the case I was furious because I mom is always sick (like very sick) and always depressed, she doesnít want her teenage daughter to be put on anti-depressants and wants her to change her lifestyle but seems to refuse to set an example this is so overly frustrating to me. I donít know what I should do if anythingÖ see I donít blame them for my adult choices as I have chosen up until recently to be unhealthy but as a kid it was their fault we ate out all the time I was allowed to eat my feeling or bored eat and my mom never helped to make sure I got the right healthy stuff or exercise. Again I donít blame them for my current challenges but seriously why canít they just care and change things like they talk aboutÖ I donít expect them to do what I am doing or help me with it but I do want them to change things and be healthier.. I feel like I should talk to them about this but I just donít know I donít want to guilt them into change but nothing else is getting through to them and my motherís therapist has ever asked her to just do at least 5 minutes a day of exercise, just five minutes thatís it.. I feel like that is not a huge request for having a longer and better life. I am being unreasonable?
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Member Comments About This Blog Post:
JENNIK2 1/23/2013 8:07PM

    Maybe if you have time you could go over there and exercise with your mom. You could be exercise partners.

Also, Spark people has a place under my tracker, then reports, that will show what your BMR is. What you looked up at another site. I use that to see what my calorie difference is for the day.

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THERIN52 1/23/2013 6:19PM

    Thank you so much to both of you! I really needed to vent, be supported and the ideas are great, I will for sure try them. I appreciate your honesty, that does give me a good outlook into what they might be feeling, I try not to be insensitive but I don't want to turn a blind eye either. I will for sure try a new game plan and some sneaky healthy recipes!

emoticon



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PICKIE98 1/23/2013 4:37PM

    I am the person both your parents are,, to a point.,, I was not on meds until last month.. I have rampant diabetes both sides of family, so it is genetic, BUT the key here is one big word, coined by my dad(dearly departed)

YAGOTTAWANNA!
<
BR>It is much easier to do what you've always done,, change is H*A*R*D*!

I do not know your parents, BUT they are in major denial and you can go to mom and offer to be her buddy, showing her how easy it is to just do leg lifts in the chair or hand weights or walk.. you can offer to do some with her,,, a couple can be in their own little world and one with depression is even more difficult to pry out of that quicksand that is their unhealthy life.
Your biggest things i living by example.. Keep on doing what you do, maybe make a spark recipe and BRING It to them to try,, without telling them it is healthy,, until after they eat it,, hand them the recipe written down for them and say nothing..

That mac and cheese could be replaced by Chef Meg's new recipe with four cheeses... Just some suggestions..

at some point we are the parent and the parents are the kids..
Keep in mind that if they had lectured or got mad at you before for something you were doing, you would have set your feet and defied them... Just sneakily show or offer them foods and ask mom to go somewhere and maybe walk in the mall.. just suggestions..

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NESARIAN 1/23/2013 4:37PM

    A complicated web.... no, you are not being ungrateful. People respond in sometimes bizarre manners to having a chronic illness. Somehow it makes sense to them to rebel against having the condition by not doing what they need to improve their health. I am glad your mom is seeing a therapist. Tough situation for all involved. Do what you can to keep yourself healthy. I am sorry you have to deal with stubborn parents. emoticon

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