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I think I need a pep talk.

Wednesday, January 23, 2013

Ok, I'm trying to not freak out. I don't want to drop a whole venty rant like I'm known to do on occasion. But I still need to work through my thoughts.

The scale said 167 this morning and I wanted to pick it up and chuck it out the window. And I know there's no good reason for me to freak out about that. I was off track for awhile and sort of just spinning my wheels and I'm just now getting back to work. My body has done this to me before. Held on to the weight for awhile when I first started exercising. Maybe it's because even though I wasn't giving 100% there for awhile, I wasn't completely blowing it and I was definitely still thinking about my goals all the time that it feels like my body should be cooperating now that I'm trying to be focused. Because I was still working out here and there. I was still eating reasonably. So I just expect when I do put the work in, results will follow.

But rationally I know I need to give it more time. I just get so impatient. And I get so obsessive when it's not working because I don't have every little thing perfect. I could seriously just go back and pick out some old ranty blog I've posted and just repost it with today's date cuz I feel exactly the same.

Why can't I accept myself where I am today AND continue working toward where I ultimately want to be? I get so lost in the whole thing. I mean really lost. And I start questioning everything. Am I eating too much dairy? Too much meat? Too much carbs? Too many calories? not enough calories? But when I try to be super disciplined, it doesn't work. I just won't do it. I can not seem to find a balance that works. So I go back and forth between thinking I'm not going to beat myself up and pressure myself but rather just try and be patient and then not seeing the results I want to see. and then i freak out about it and decide to not give myself any leeway which doesn't work cuz I have no discipline and very poor time management skills. And I start having thoughts like if I had more time, it would be easier. If I didn't need to work, if I only had to think about myself instead of 3 other people, if I had more money. I get all frustrated about all the obstacles. And then I think ah, screw it, I'll just stay fat. None of these options are getting me anywhere. I don't even really know what I was doing when I was being successful!

Sometimes it's really hard to picture me getting to my goal, or even close to my goal. I feel like I've hit a wall at halfway. And I'm just gonna be stuck here forever.

Ok that was rant. Sorry.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    *hug* hang in there!! My scale went UP and I can't quite figure it out... no, it's not muscle weight. I'm thinking maybe water from some extra salt. Either way -- I keep going, knowing that the exercises I do and the healthy food I put in my body are more important that what the scale says. YOU ARE MORE THAN A NUMBER! You are a vibrant, beautiful you! We can all make this journey together!! :)
    1856 days ago
    Don't worry, it's healthy to rant. We all have these thoughts at one time or another. Stay on track and the rewards will follow. emoticon
    1856 days ago
    Don't give up! It will happen! emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1856 days ago
    I completely get that rant. My body is doign the same to me right now. It's frustrating. But if we keep doing what we KNOW Is the right path, we will get there.
    1857 days ago
  • LMH1223
    I totally get where you're coming from! You are not alone in how you feel at all!!! I question a lot of the same things you do, am I eating enough? too much? You CAN do this and you WILL do this!! Vent all you need, that's what you need and it helps so much!! I need to learn to vent more, I hold it in and keep it myself and that is not helping me at all!

    Hang in there girl!! YOU CAN DO THIS!!!!
    1857 days ago
    I know exactly how you feel. I think one of the best comments here is to trust the process. I know it's hard sometimes. My body is the same way. I can be "perfect" for an entire week and get on the scale and see no change or even a gain. Talk about frustration. Everyone wants to see a reward for hard work and effort we put in. The key is to be consistent and push through and it will eventually fall into place. Especially if you are starting a new workout program. It's a lifestyle change and something you will have to do forever, so try not to look at it as something you start and stop. Just keep plugging along. One good decision at a time. Way easier said than done. And keep reaching out for support just as you have been. You've got this!
    1857 days ago
    Well, if you're into instant gratification (or recognition ... not sure how to word it) you may get a monitor that tells you how many calories you burn. I use the bodymedia but there are lots of others. It's very satisfying to see that I've burned more calories than I've taken in. It gives me reassurance that I am on the right track. It is more helpful to me than the scale. Perhaps getting something like that would help you out.

    Other than that I would just say, vent it you need to!! Venting is usually very helpful and I wholeheartedly approve of it as a means of getting past something. To me, it seems as though you're on the right track, and know that these things take time.

    Have a great day!
    1857 days ago
    I am going through something similar as well. I have decided to tweak some things and try that. I know its hard but you have accomplished so much! emoticon
    1857 days ago
  • FIT4MEIN2013
    Deep breath! Maybe you SHOULD throw the scales out the window. Scales show us a snapshot of where we are RIGHT NOW. Take a nap and weigh again and they will show a completely different number. Frankly I can rarely tell you what I weigh, even though I may way a few times a week. Why? Because I am looking for TRENDS not a snapshot. If I am trending down over the weeks, I know I am doing ok, even though the traitorous scales may lie and say that I ate an extra 7000 calories yesterday.

    Hang in there! emoticon
    1857 days ago
  • BEVERLYB1989
    I know how you feel girl, I'm in the exact same spot. Sometimes the scale just doesn't say what we want it to (I've been reeeaaaallll close to actually chucking the scale across the room). We've just gotta keep pushing on!!
    1857 days ago
    You got this! I get aggravated and frustrated anytime the scale does not cooperate with me. I frequently day dream of throwing it through a window watching the glass shatter and the scale hit the ground and bust into a million pieces lol. DON'T give up.
    1857 days ago
    You know you're not going to be stuck forever. You've already stated the reason for the "stall" in your progress, you've started working out again. It just your body saying "whoa, what's going on." Trust the process and you'll see progress. You can do this!
    1857 days ago
    We all feel that way. Trust me -- whenever I have to adjust my tracker UP or not change my weight for weeks at a time -- I definitely feel like that. The key is to just keep going. Don't stop. Don't go back to your bad habits. Given enough time, you WILL kick that scale's ass!
    1857 days ago
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