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    RAINA413   94,320
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Job/Friend Issues


Wednesday, January 23, 2013

I feel like crap. I know I really shouldn't let it get to me since I have no control over this, but I just saw a Facebook post of a good friend and former co-worker complaining that someone (at least I was allowed to remain nameless) got the job she had been pushing for for three years almost immediately after she moved out of state. Made me feel kinda crappy.

I emailed her to let her know that before I knew she was leaving I went to our bosses and suggested her for the position. Truth be told, she would have been great at it! When I heard she was planning to leave I went to them again and told them she would stay if given the position. I have no idea why they didn't give it to her and I was equally shocked by the promotion. I told her how sorry I was about how it all played out and that I hope she doesn't hold it against me.

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Blog Post Update
I have since emailed my former co-worker and friend a few more times now. I realize she is still hurting from this but thankfully a close mutual friend of mine happen to let me know yesterday that she never held me responsible for any of this and DOES know that I went to bat for her with our employers on more than one occasion. Right now I am just going to give her some time and some space and just feel relieved that she knows I was not the cause of her distress.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post:
OPTIMIST1948 2/3/2013 9:39AM

    Its always difficult when someone else gets the job we want. But its not your fault. Sometimes they are just not the right person for the job.

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CINERICIA 1/25/2013 8:17AM

    A strained friendship is a difficult thing. But you handled the situation--both before and after your friend's departure--with true grace. The way I would want a friend to act if it were me. Enjoy your promotion knowing that you earned it.

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SIMPLE_TAILOR 1/24/2013 6:13AM

    While there will be a stain/scar in the relationship, it will heal . . . it may just take a little time . . .

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DOGLADY13 1/23/2013 10:49PM

    You did nothing wrong and I think your response to her is admirable. Don't carry her baggage around for her. Lord knows, we overpack our own bags as it is. Even she acknowledged that she pushed for 3 years for a job and didn't get it. There is a reason for that.

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LOGIMOM2010 1/23/2013 9:55PM

    If she's a true friend, once she's passed the dented pride, things will be good. Don't let it spoil your feelings about the new job

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LUVLYLORELEI 1/23/2013 2:32AM

    Sounds to me like her pride's a little hurt. Don't let her words make you feel as bad about getting the position as she does about you getting the position she wanted and didn't get. That may be her reaction, but there's no need for you to internalize that. It's up to you to chose between feeling good and feeling crappy. I wouldn't let her chose that for you. Congrats on a job well done.

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SIMPLYDEE 1/23/2013 2:03AM

    i f you did nothing wrong then you have nothing to be sorry about.Maybe God had this planned for you. Good luck in your new position.

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