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    ON2VICTORY   46,679
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Now for the big challenge...

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Tuesday, January 22, 2013

This has been a tough 2 weeks for me. Without wanting to be redundant, I will simply say that I had the worst anxiety / depressive episode I have ever had. All of the triggers were present to bring on the mother of all panic attacks. It has taken a while but after some corrective action, I have finally gotten to a place where I am back to my old self.

After some therapy (ongoing) and some modifications in my lifestyle, I have seen some relief and a new sense of being on the right track. I have admitted to my issues and I am not ashamed to admit them here. This may very well be one of the last blockades from reaching my ultimate goal. I sense a new victory may be on the horizon for me. It may take a while for me to get it right but I will continue to march.

One of these days I will march seven times around the walls that hold me back, blow the trumpet and watch them in a moment of glory as they fall flat. That day I will sound the charge and show no mercy to those things that have kept me slogging along on the emotional treadmill.

Those episodes have been compounded by my rotating shift schedule . I waste alot of good training time recovering from the emotional eating and compromised mental state and by the time I get back to training readiness, its back to night shift again.

Now for the big challenge. I am going on nights tomorrow for another 7 days . I have things in place (no medication) and a plan of action to cope with it. If I am successful, this is going to be my golden ticket to success. This is really the last really big hurdle to my ultimate success. We will put this to the test over the next 7 days. Will it be perfect? Of course not, nothing ever is the first few times much like passing a dull knife over a sharpening steel. Keep at it and it will be perfected to a razors edge.

While I am never excited about getting another dose of the equivalent of jet lag, I am excited about focusing on this issue because eventually I will be able to successfully manage it rather than being constantly being knocked to the ground. Its hard to lose weight when I am forever recovering from emotional binge eating and all of the stress hormones.

I feel confident.

Training for my 70.3 doesn't start on the running path, cycling, or swimming laps. It starts with managing myself and my inner core. From there, the forces that drive my eating patterns are controlled. Once eating patterns are stabilized, the weight takes care of itself. For every pound lost, my pace gets faster and every stroke more efficient.

Yeah, I got this.

Link To My Public Blog... mailboxes2miles.blogspot
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CATNCAG 8/8/2013 10:49AM

    Great positivity! I love it! Yes, we've both got this!!! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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SUPERSYLPH 7/19/2013 10:48AM

    emoticon You can do it!!!

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ELAINE725 3/11/2013 2:58PM

    Keep it going. You can do it!!! emoticon

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EFFRAYECHILDE 2/11/2013 10:05AM

    emoticon

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TERRIJ7 2/7/2013 9:48PM

    I'm a little late in reading this blog. I hope you did well--now I'll have to go and read your subsequent blogs to find out! :)

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MISSLISA1973 2/5/2013 12:43AM

    You are an amazing individual. I love that you share yourself with us and grow through it. I hope you did well and love yourself the same either way. Lucky for me, there's already another blog after this one, so I can check on you without waiting!

emoticon Lisa

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FRABBIT 2/3/2013 3:45PM

  Very brave to share this!

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KITTYKRS 2/2/2013 10:16PM

  I, too, worked shift work for a large part of my adult life. I know exactly what you are saying. Keep up the great work and you WILL succeed!!

Stay encouraged...there are many more of us just like you!! emoticon

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BKLYNDIVA 1/31/2013 1:07AM

    emoticon

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FOREVERFITCHICK 1/30/2013 1:00PM

    Thank you for sharing, mostly because I struggle to understand anxiety, panic and depressive disorders. It is something that should be discussed as openly as we discuss weight loss and individual well being! You are a trooper and I'm rootin' for YOU!


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NANAGO1204 1/29/2013 1:50PM

    You go girl!! Looking forward to be with you, with my trumpet, to rejoice with you when the walls fall flat! In the meantime, count me in among those who will be with you in the march, however long it takes! May the week go smoothly and sleep come when it is suppose to. emoticon
OK, now since this is seven days later...how did it go?

Comment edited on: 1/29/2013 1:52:12 PM

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BOXERSOFTIE 1/29/2013 12:51PM

  emoticon I have suffered from panic disorder for 30 years so I truly understand your journey. Please know that I am praying for you, cheering for you and rooting you on. Go get 'em!

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DOTTY7267 1/29/2013 11:11AM

    Once again, your honesty has helped tremendously. Keep pressing forward, because YOU can do it!

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SJKENT1 1/28/2013 10:46PM

    Can't wait to hear the shouts and hear that wall come down.

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BMCKEOW1 1/28/2013 2:03PM

    You've got this. Stay strong, you are worth it.

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WALKMYWAYTOFIT 1/27/2013 10:51PM

    You rock!! What an inspiration you are. Keep on keeping on.... kick those roadblocks out of your way.... Yay! emoticon emoticon

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MIRANDA907 1/27/2013 4:40PM

    First I would like to say that your post is very well written. Second, awesome attitude, I believe positivity is the key, or at least one of them. Good luck, you got this! emoticon

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REALKIEKEY 1/27/2013 4:11PM

    You got this! Keep the plan in arms reach and remember it is there when it gets tough. emoticon emoticon

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FLATROSIE 1/27/2013 8:49AM

    Always remember: you're stronger than you think!

Keep your goals in sight and you can only succeed.

One day at a time! :)

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TAWANDA_IS_BACK 1/26/2013 10:46PM

    emoticon

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JADASMOM2 1/26/2013 6:58PM

  Good for you!

emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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ALICIOUSPINK_86 1/26/2013 11:03AM

    I suffer from severe anxiety and depression also, I totally understand that slow and steady steps to get stabilized and moving again. Thanks for showing us that we can pull ourselves out of any rut and bringing inspiration and motivation to our hearts!

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LIFETIMER54 1/26/2013 8:12AM

  emoticon emoticon

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ANDYGIRL1219 1/26/2013 6:19AM

  emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon my thoughts are with you - be well!

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CTMOM2KIDS 1/25/2013 11:03PM

    Yeah, you got this! Best of luck to you! You are doing a great job keeping it all together!

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POINDEXTRA 1/25/2013 9:36PM

    Good luck - let us know how it goes.

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CLPURNELL 1/25/2013 6:32PM

    emoticon emoticon

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VICKI-BISHOP56 1/25/2013 5:16PM

  emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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MADMARE 1/25/2013 2:23PM

    Stay strong and stick to your plan. Rotating shifts are so disruptive to most people, I wish employers could figure out a better way of scheduling. emoticon

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DANIBEV 1/25/2013 1:00PM

    Good luck!! You can do it!

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IDJ1973 1/25/2013 11:32AM

    You are a wonderful strong person.. Keep up the good work

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SCHNEBL 1/25/2013 10:58AM

    Good for you for having a plan! That's the way to success!

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LIFETIMER54 1/25/2013 6:35AM

  emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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PENNYPACKER3 1/25/2013 6:24AM

    emoticon

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TEACHEROF4TH 1/24/2013 11:50PM

    You keep going, don't let anything or anyone stop you.

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CYPATAYLOR2 1/24/2013 10:53PM

  I have confidence in you! You can do this!!!!!!!!!

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NEWMOM20121 1/24/2013 8:33PM

    You can do it. Stay the course.

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IMIN2GENES 1/24/2013 8:30PM

    Thinking about you and sending you lots of positive energy! Glad to hear you've got your plan ready. Keep up the good work!
Chris
emoticon

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DR8561 1/24/2013 8:19PM

    If your new non-medicated plan works, I would love to hear more about it. Wishing you the best!
emoticon

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DONNAFADLER 1/24/2013 8:05PM

  Thanks for sharing.

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AJB121299 1/24/2013 7:04PM

    nice

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BMELT2013 1/24/2013 5:52PM

    emoticon

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CARLENLLOYD 1/24/2013 3:56PM

    Way to go! Thanks for the encouragement!

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FIRECOM 1/24/2013 3:48PM

    Your path is clear and I am confident that you will make it OK.

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NEEDBU66 1/24/2013 3:38PM

    I'm rooting for you.

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IN102WIN 1/24/2013 3:20PM

    emoticon emoticon and I am enjoying the public blog!

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MIMETALKER 1/24/2013 2:47PM

    emoticon

Without looking at the other comments, I'm sure someone else has already used this "emotican". But that's okay...just shows others know you can do it too.

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ICANDI4U 1/24/2013 1:46PM

    Great attitude with positive thinking. You can accomplish anything since your mind is already set. I know you do it!

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JEFEIST 1/24/2013 1:02PM

    Thank you so much for sharing. May I add you to my prayer list?

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ANGELWINGS71079 1/24/2013 12:55PM

    Flipping shifts makes it difficult to get a routine together, and without a routine or appointments with yourself it is hard. I have no doubt that you will find a way to make it work for you based on your flipping schedual. Happy Sparking!!!!
emoticon

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