Tuesday, January 22, 2013
I hope everyone who reads this (all 3 or 4 of you) is having a fantastic start to their week! It was, for me anyway, a nice long weekend. I am back to my weekly rush, and while I am not working today, it always seems as though there is plenty to be done. I am a Mom and a fiance (soon to be wife) and that by definition makes me a taxi. 3 kids, 3 schools, 3 different towns and two working adults, one car. I am not sure the math makes sense, but we make it work.
I have been thinking a lot about my fears and insecurities lately. Some are hard to think about and even harder to admit. They are like roadblocks, not just in my weight loss journey, but to EVERYTHING in life.
When did I get to be so afraid?
I am working on confronting those fears. Admitting them, like any problem, is the first step to over coming them. Today's fears:
1. I work on call, when I don't work, I feel like I let my family, especially my fiance, down.
2. I am afraid I will over eat in a fit of hunger, in fact, I am starting to get hungry now.
3. I am afraid my emotions will run away with me, at some point today, and I will snap at my family for unnecessary reasons.
To begin to overcome these fears, I am going to attempt to use positive self talk. I used to be such an optimistic person. I still am, for the most part, but I have become so very hard on myself.
Today I have decided:
1. While I do work whenever I can, I do a lot around the house when I am home. We are not hurting, homeless or hungry. The laundry is done. Dinner is in the crock pot and the house is clean. Today will still be full of accomplishments.
2. I am hungry because it is almost lunch time. That is okay. It is okay to be hungry. I will eat soon. Drink lots of water, have a fiber one bar this afternoon and be fine. I will survive until dinner. If I can stick to that, I have a sweet treat planned for tonight that I have already accounted for on my calorie tracker. REWARD!
3. My fiance tells me its the expression of my emotions that he loves about me. I rarely SNAP at my family and usually internalize most emotions. The worst that can happen, I get upset, bothered, a few tears and its over. It is okay to express those emotions.
4. I have enjoyed exceptionally clear skin lately, that itself is cause to feel great!!!
That being said, I need to start a load of laundry and make myself a sandwich for lunch. I am counting down the hours until Zumba tonight and the days until the weekend in which my fiance and I get a few days kid free. Sleep, rest, and probably a little fun.
Happy Tuesday Y'all!