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Lack of friendship has been getting to me...

Saturday, January 19, 2013

Late yesterday and early today I battled a small bout of depression. I've come to realize that I don't really have friends to rely on, my best friend and I arent friends any more, and my ex who had said that we could still be friends has been making excusses on why we cant hang out when we planned on it. It's a bit difficult to adjust and I feel a bit lonely. I am rekindling an old friendship with a girl I used to hang out with often in high school so I guess thats a pretty good thing. It's just hard when everything you know changes and the friends you have turn into enimies... :/ but I'm doing better now after talking to this girl, she understands what it feels like to just be left behind and forgotten.
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JADOMB 1/24/2013 9:20PM

    You need to learn how to be alone without being lonely. I can go all day long(or weeks for that matter) without having to have any kind of true social bonding. That's not to say I don't appreciate conversations with others. Heck, I talk too much on here and FB. ;-) But I am NOT dependent on it.

Once you have mastered NOT being dependent on social stimuli, then when it happens, it is much more pleasant. If I'm just looking for someone intelligent to talk to, I just talk to myself. LOL You have friends here to talk to and that love you for who you are. Stay strong and keep the faith.

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POOLEEBARBARA 1/21/2013 11:40AM

    I understand what you're going through. I've never had many friends, and as of recently (November) I have lost both friends that I thought I'd never lose. I lost one over a job (really? a job?) and the other just lost contact. I'd attempt to catch up, but no one's wanting to ever. So now, my friends are my online friends. They keep me motivated, and they're there to lend an ear. We can do it!

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SUNSET09 1/19/2013 11:08PM

  You're never behind nor forgotten. People are exs for a reason and sometimes, when that connection that never was is gone, what's left? Get out, go to church, get on a committee, take a class as there are people out there that will give you the spark you need. You are worthy and sometimes, it's a good thing when these people move so you can find that person who is worthy of your love, trust and friendship! We can feel alone in a room full of people. Love yourself first! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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DLDMIL 1/19/2013 9:59PM

    I am with you too. We just have to keep moving forward, one day at a time. I have a couple of BF's but they live in different states, so I try to email and talk to them at least weekly. I work and go home 90% of the time. I have found a local spark team and meet with them twice a week to exercise. emoticon

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SCHNOOTIE 1/19/2013 9:54PM

    I think as we get older and life situations change, we all change as well as the people around us. I have one friend from high school and a friend I met at my job 6 years ago. Those are really the only people I am friends with. There are others who are fun to be with once in a while, but there are just not that many people out there who are committed to a friendship. I think most people know what you are going through, and I am so sorry that you are lonely. Here is a hug emoticon

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MKATE88 1/19/2013 8:43PM

    This same thing happened to me after high school. My best friend, with whom we'd planned on being maids of honor for each other, married without me by her side, and me without her. Thanks for sharing such raw feelings. Sending you warm fuzzy feelings!

emoticon

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JUMPINJULIE 1/19/2013 4:33PM

    I know excatly how you feel. All my Best Friends that say they'll be your friends for life are no longer my friends. So i have my spark buddies which is pretty good. But it gets better it just takes time to move past it but you can get past it.

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BMELT2013 1/19/2013 4:14PM

    I think we've all been there at some point in our life. I was in a similar situation for almost eight years. Things have just started getting better over the last year. It's really hard to do but you just have to stopping looking for a friend and just find contentment in the things you love . I really let it get me down for a long time. Over the last year I have discovered the more content I am the more people seem to want to be around me. Get out there and enjoy life people will be drawn to you. I am happier now than I've been in long time and I still don't have any really close friends, Don't let it get you down. Things will get better. emoticon

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LIFTINGLIFE 1/19/2013 3:58PM

    Do you have meetup groups in your area? I've found that a good way to meet friends with similiar interests. It's difficult as an adult to meet friends as we're not often in social situations like school. As for the ex, I agree, forget him! I did the same w/my ex, and we ended up in and out of a relationship/friendship/not speaking cycle for FIVE FREAKEN YEARS!! Hang in there :)

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FMB2014 1/19/2013 3:53PM

    I'm not sure if you're able to where you live, but if there is a community center or a YMCA go there. You'll meet people interested in what YOU like to do. Craigslist often has platonic friendships listed for people that want to meet others on a just friends basis.

My advice about your ex is forget em. Move forward and meet someone new that you don't have to worry about cancelled plans and feeling lonely. You are worth it!

The thing that drew me to your post was your mention of depression. I myself have struggled with depression and know the value of getting help. I meet with a therapist once a week and find that she's like a safety net. I know that there is SOMEONE to listen to me that isn't going to judge me (like friends or family might) and help me find a good way to get through the sadness.

Good luck and if you ever need to talk I'm here :)

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4THELOVEOFDOLLS 1/19/2013 3:49PM

    It is a very difficult place to be in...Few friends, losing old ones. Trust that you are a worthy and beautiful person. I know it is hard for i have been where you are many times in my life. Trust yourself and be good to yourself. You most likely will find new friends enjoying the things you love to do. Engage in what you love sports hobbies etc and you are in a good position to meet new people with your interests. Do not sale yourself short. A true friend loves you as you are. Wishing you love and happiness. emoticon emoticon

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