Friday, January 18, 2013
Well today was my 3rd in StarkPeople, and it was the day I lapsed
1st day I exercised and ate calories within my range,
2nd day I skipped exercising but I ate very healthy and calories-wise. I also went to the supermarket and bought many healthy foods!
3rd day, I began well, but i did not manage to study as well as I wanted for my forthcoming exams, and I got really stressed at night, and even though I had just eaten my dinner just an hour ago, and I was not really hungry, I needed to eat junk food!
I say i am an emotional eater, but truth is that i am actually a stress-eater. I think I can cope well with the rest of my negative emotions whenever they appear, but stress is my destruction!!! When I stress I feel like there is a monster inside me revolting and asking for food, lots of food, and especially greesy! And this monster won;t leave me in peace unless I stuff it with junk food :(
So once again today, even though I started feeling very positive, and even though I had a fridge fool of healthy and good for me food, I ordered delivery. and I ate until the "monster felt better" and I started feel bad, and guilty.
So....I was feeling very bad and I was beating myself to it, but just confessing it to an environment that is supportive and not judgemental made me feel much better!
Which lead me to an great idea about a project!
more details coming soon!
My love to anyone that reads! :)