I didn't gain the weight all at one time so I can safely say I won't lose it all at one time.

It takes hard work and diligence to live a healthy lifestyle. Plenty of temptation gets put in my way and it's up to me to see past it - to see what it is I want.

Yes, I have a treat or desert. Every single day. I built it into my caloric intake.

Many days it consists of a Hunt's Snack Pack Chocolate Pudding Cup, Fat Free. Not because I'm worried about fat grams, I'm worried about hydrogenated oils.

Or I may enjoy a Kozy Shack Tapioca or Rice Pudding Cup. The kind with sugar, not sugar free. Again, it's the sucralose (Splenda) I'm worried about.

I started out on this journey as I mean to go. My focus is on being healthy. To be less about the numbers on the scale and more about how I physically feel.

So I eat healthy as opposed to being on a diet, practicing moderation, not deprivation. I try to stay within the mid-point of my SP range - currently around 1385 calories a day.

The amazing concurrent event that has been happening is that as I address the emotional overeating in part by limiting my contact with negativity - the stronger my resolve gets about continuing that way even after the weight is gone.

I physically feel so much better. I'm just not dragging around past events, hurts, and slights. I'm learning to let them go. To make peace with them. I say, "Just because I forgive doesn't mean I will forget. I will remember." And that helps give me the strength.

Because I think part of the reason I'm so hesitant to let go of those things is because by doing so I'm afraid I'll forget and allow myself to be hurt again. But it's the opposite. Forgiving is freeing.

It means feeling my emotions, not feeding them. And even though it is a scary process, I can do it. Because what I want is on the other side of fear.