Thursday, January 17, 2013
Recently at a funeral (of all places) the minister comforted the family by saying: “Every exit is also an entrance. When you go out of the exit you immediately are entering onto a new path.” Somehow in my life – specifically my life as it relates to food and health – instead of taking an exit I’ve gotten stuck in a revolving door. Diet, loose some weight, “fall off the wagon,” eat whatever, gain weight, diet, loose some weight, “fall off the wagon,” and round and round we go. Similarly, if we’re driving, instead of taking a new exit we tend to go the route we’ve always taken. It’s comfortable. Safe. Easy. And guess what… the destination is always the same.
So why is it so hard to get out of the revolving door – and STAY out? To try a new exit – and make it to a new destination? How can I iron out this wrinkle? Sounds like it might be time for some starch! The younger generation might not understand this illustration but I remember VERY well my grandmother and mother adding either liquid starch to the washing machine or spray on starch when ironing. It made the clothes more crisp and stiff… and harder to wrinkle. Frankly I HATED the way it felt but it did work. Since from time to time I’ve successfully ironed out the wrinkle of the revolving door temporarily, now I have to buck up, add the starch and take my fresh, smoothed-out self onto a new exit.
Starch, however, doesn’t last forever. You have to add more each time you wash and dry the clothes. What is my starch? What’s the one thing that keeps me crisp and clean? I use to think it was will power. In fact that was what I was getting ready to write when it hit me clear between the eyes – will power is the same exit I’ve taken over and over in the past. That’s more like fabric softener – it smells good for a while but the effects aren’t as lasting. As a member of Overeaters Anonymous I have often repeated the OA Promise and now I’m coming to both the understanding and the conviction that THIS is my starch:
The OA Promise
I put my hand in yours, and together we can do what we could never do alone. No longer is there a sense of hopelessness, no longer must we each depend upon our own unsteady willpower. We are all together now, reaching out our hands for power and strength greater than ours (our Higher Power/God), and as we join hands, we find love and understanding beyond our wildest dreams.
GOD is my starch. OA helps me remember that it’s not my will power that will get me to a new destination…it’s trusting that in my weakness He will be my source of strength. Not me. Not my self will. Not a diet or program. True faith means to surrender to a power greater than myself – a higher power – my savior. Now that’s an “Ah ha…” moment.