Thursday, January 17, 2013
My desire for too much permeates every aspect of my life. As does my trepidation about say "no"to myself. My weight loss journey has helped somewhat, I started by eating the same amounts of better foods, but with time I have learned that if I do want cake, it can be eaten in mouthfuls rather than platefuls and that a bag of chips is not necessarily one serving size. And I have come to find in this way that I don't really miss as much as I thought I would.
But what about the other things?
I have too much stuff. I think it's very closely connected to my weight problem. I carry around more than I need. I go to address it. I get upset. I get overwhelmed. I go shopping. My closets are about to bust, dresser drawers sloppy and overflowing. Everything compromised for the sake of more. And truth be told, I don't even like much of it. So why is it still here? Why can't I just get off my butt and do something about it?
Last night I got fed up. Actually, if I'm honest, I got angry at myself. There was a fight within me that was my breaking point (very similar to how I got on my weight loss journey). I got a few garbage bags and started rampaging through my closet. It wasn't even tough decisions, anything that I was torn over, I kept. I can get that on the next pass. This was strictly a "why do I still have this, it's 2 sizes too big now" mission.
Three bags already filled. Three bags of stuff lighter. Three bags of uselessness that someone will find useful. Three bags of weight I don't need to worry about any more. And when I am done, I will have earned my shopping treat and I will buy things that I love. And I will never cram my drawers for the sake of fullness again.