Thursday, January 17, 2013
The light the heatÖ I am completeÖ
If I really thought about it, that would have to be one of my all time favorite songs. It just opens up something in me. It means a lot to me and is associated with very good memories.
When I was in high school, I was a theater kid. I was in a Christian theater group called ToDAY productions and at the very first retreat that I went to, before I was actually apart of the group, there was a reflection time. We laid in a circle on the gym floor, each of us had a tea light and we were lead through a meditation first focusing on the flame of the candle and then the song came on. Iím not sure why I remember that a good 16 years later, but I think it will be a memory that always sticks with me.
Iíve always been drawn to music, it calms me. I donít know why, but it does. Now Iím not particularly great at anything musical. I canít play an instrument, I can barely read music, but I am a fairly decent singer. Iíve always been in awe of those who could play.
So last night was not a good night for Rachael & me, so today I am paying for it. When I cry really hard, my face hurts the next day. We fought, and while itís all worked out now, I hate it when we fight. It seems that the next few days after a fight, we seem to just be off. I donít know if I could just pinpoint what exactly is off, but itís just not right for a few days. The energy is skewed or something.
I hate fighting. I hate confrontation. I donít know. I just, I seem to do better being a little more passive. I do know how to fight. I do know how to stick up for myself, but I donít like to.
My thoughts are scattered today, I think it has to do with the skewed energy. Iím looking at joining a gym. We finally got a planet fitness thatís near my work and I think I would actually use it. I donít know very much about gyms and wanted to get everyoneís opinion. So what do you think about joining a gym? What gym do you go to?