Wednesday, January 16, 2013
It has been almost a month since I got off track. I was going to the gym almost every day, sometimes twice a day. I was doing great. I was focused. And then the holidays came rolling around and BOOM...I crash. And I start to miss a few days. Then I get sick and miss several days. And then work events, kid events, family gatherings, etc all become more important that the hour I need to work on me. And of course I swore I would get right back into it. And I have...a little bit. But I cant seem to build myself back up to where I was. I cant seem to force myself to get in the gym every single day. It is like I just dont want to, EXCEPT I DO WANT TO!! So what is it exactly that holds me back?? Laziness? Lack of focus? Lack of energy? Fear of failure? Fear of success? I mean, I want this so bad right? So why is it sooo hard for me to do?
I do not have the answers. I dont know why I am struggling. I do know that previously all those little distractions would have made me give up all together. So at least this time I am still going. I just need to go more. I just need to stick to the schedule I plan no matter what my mind is telling me. I need to push til it becomes habit all over again. Aggghh. This is the part I hate. Starting all the way back over. Well sorta. It is not all the way back over. Maybe that little piece right there...the part where I did not stop going completely...maybe that is the piece that will make this work for me. I did not give up, and so I am just progressing instead of beginning.
Ok, I am done for now. :)