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    LILLEAN   34,404
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He said the unexpected.........

Sunday, January 13, 2013

Two nights ago my husband said something to me that I didn't expect at all. He told me that he doesn't want me to loose any more weight and that he likes the size I'm at right now. Since joining spark people I've lost 30 pounds and I don't intend on stopping until I'm at a healthy BMI. So what do I do now? I think I need to talk to him and let him know that I'm doing this for me, to be a healthier person; I just hope he understands...........
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MNNICE 1/15/2013 10:54AM

    Whether you lose weight or not, exercise is important for your health, but perhaps you could work out together or he could help free up another time for you to exercise by helping out with cooking, cleaning, etc?? You need to feel good and be healthy in order to give him the "best" of you!

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CAKEMAKERMOM 1/14/2013 11:09PM

    I would talk to him and find out the real reason why he doesn't want you to lose any more weight. Like some other people said, he might be insecure because you're looking so good. You need to find the weight you're comfortable with and not give in because everyone else says that you should stop.

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LILLEAN 1/14/2013 7:53PM

    Thanks so much for all the advice and support. That's why I love sparkpeople

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CINDYTW 1/14/2013 7:11PM

  If your doctor is fine with where you are, then it is a decision YOU must make based on how you feel. If you feel good just working out and doing what you do now, then keep it up and maintain. If not, he will have to adjust. and another 10 will not remove any and all curves he may be concerned about.


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PAULKNUTH 1/13/2013 8:24PM

    My son in-law did not want my step daughter to reach an ideal weight. He admitted his motivation was based on insecurity. Other men would find her attractive. She never did lose the weight. Of course, he is fit.

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LILLEAN 1/13/2013 5:12PM

    @ cindy, my doctor is fine with my weight, I have no health problems but I feel like I want to lose about 10 more pounds again and then I can compromise but will he (my husband) accept that? I don't know. He says working out takes too much of "his" time like getting out of bed for my morning workout (maybe he wants to cuddle more). I'm going to speak with him in a bit, I'll keep you guys posted

Comment edited on: 1/13/2013 5:13:28 PM

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CINDYTW 1/13/2013 5:02PM

  If health is the biggest concern, then maybe you should look at other measures as well, such as body fat %, waist circumference, and all your blood work. If that is all OK, then maybe you can come to a comprimise. Yes, it is for you and it is your body. Most women struggle to please their men, or attract one, and you don't have to! What does your doctor say about your health right now?

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BLUE42DOWN 1/13/2013 4:19PM

    Definitely talk. Try to find the things about you losing more weight that worry him. Yes, for some it is a fear that we will eventually be "too good" for them. But for others, it might be a fear we'll take it too far, losing curves they are happy with. There's a lot of things, sometimes even the natural dislike of too much change, that can lead to someone wanting us to stop where we are.

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