Saturday, January 12, 2013
People say, It must be lonly without Ed and it is but it is so much more than that. How can it be more than lonliness? I am not sure but I know that it is so much more.
It is having one side of the bed unmade because I now sleep alone. It is having one plate, one knife, one fork and one spoon at meals because I now eat alone. It is always sitting in the driver's seat with no one in the other seat because I now run errands alone. It is getting groceries purchased, loaded, and home in half the time because Ed isn't with me and stopping to talk to people because I am alone. It is taking twice the time to do what used to take half the time, because I am alone. It is being the odd person at a friend's birthday dinner because I am no longer a couple but I am alone.
The worst is when someone says let's do this or that and I have to say, I can't because I have so much less income and so many more bills and I am facing it all alone!
Lord, God and Father, only you can get me through this and turn it into compassionate help for others. Please Lord, comfort me, help me through this that I may do the same for others.