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Trying To Be More Positive (Rant) Warning

Friday, January 11, 2013

In one of the daily blogs today, SP had a 30 or 60 day free trial of this stress site and how to deal with stress. I decided to try it. I am very good at focusing on the negative and not on the positive. I keep focusing on what is bad in my life. We were supposed to write about a situation that was negative and how it could have changed.

The stuff with my brother in particular. It is very easy to say that I won't let him get to me, but he does. Yes, I am afraid that he will come after me, when I know rationally, he doesn't have a legal leg to stand on.

Then, I wonder if I handled the situation right when he was in my house. Should I have let him see that he hurt me or should I have continued to stand up to him. He did scare me when he got this look in his eyes and he started to explode.

I also wonder if I shouldn't have responded to his e-mail. Not by e-mail, but by phone. I could have called him and given it right back to him point for point. I should have told him that he had no right to anything that was mother's. He hated mother and she knew it. He came in town and never saw her. I should have told him that he has some very serious emotional issues to deal with if he is still focused on things that happened 20+ years ago. I should have also told him that he knows nothing about me and has no right to assume anything. I should have further told him that he is truly nothing to me. All I see is someone who waited until their mother died just to take from her because he feels he was deprived as a child. Oh too bad! Get over it!

My mother didn't do anything she didn't want to do. I wouldn't have had horses if mother hadn't wanted them. I didn't want to keep showing. I thought it was a joke. Same rich people with their expensive horses keep winning every show. But, I did it because my mother enjoyed it.

Further, I should have told the a@@hole, exactly where he could go in no uncertain terms. I should have told him that my mother warned me about him. She told me, when she was in the home, that he was going to try to sell all her artwork.

You know what and I just realized this...he hated her so much that he never came in town to see her for all that time when she was sick. For 6 weeks, he couldn't even visit her. Who the h3ll does he think he is.

Yes, I was a wimp when I was with him and when he e-mailed me, but no more. If he wants to get the courts involved, I will be happy to tell the judge. He hated her. As a friend said, he obviously wished he was never born since he hated her so much and she gave life to him. I am not going to kowtow to him anymore. He is just a stranger to me. I am done.

I am so happy I wrote this blog because this way, if he calls or does whatever his next move is, my thoughts are written down and I can remember the truth and not be caught off guard. America, the next time my brother contacts me if it is by phone not e-mail, he is going to get an earful!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    emoticon just emoticon hang in there.
    1893 days ago
  • JUSTME29
    Didn't you say he's the executor of the will? I guess I just don't understand that decision on your mother's part. I'm sure it's what she thought best, but I don't understand.

    It would feel great to give back to him what he's given to you, but what are you going to accomplish? What are you hoping to achieve? Being hurtful (even when it's the truth) for the sake of being hurtful puts you on the level with your siblings. You seem to know your legal standing, so stick to that. Giving an earful would feel fantastic in the short term, but limiting your communication to email gives you time to really think about what you're saying, plus it gives you a permanent record of what is said. If this goes to the court, that could come in handy.

    I'm really, truly sorry that you're having to deal with all this with your family. Family is not supposed to be like that.
    1893 days ago
    I agree with LOPEYP let the attorneys talk.
    1893 days ago
    I agree with the other comment. It would be ideal if you could not talk with him at all & he could just speak with an attorney. I hate to see any energy go his way. He is not worth for breath from my limited viewpoint.
    1893 days ago
    I am sorry for your losses I too lost my mom June 09 and in her last two weeks alive my two sisters did nothing but fight over her possessions. i never left her side as she would have done the same for any one of us and the day she was buried I walked away from the two sisters - so sad she dedicated her life to her kids and they couldn't give her an ounce of respect in her last days! I sure don't miss the unnecessary arguing and hard feelings they caused. One sister even stole money from her account 5 days before she passed and my mom found out about it. I really miss my mom and will keep living knowing I was there for her. Take one day at a time and don't get bullied by family. Take care!
    1894 days ago
    It's too bad that your mother didn't change her will.
    I would stop interacting with him and tell him to talk to your attorney. Stay strong! emoticon
    1894 days ago
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