Tug of War (with myself)
Wednesday, January 09, 2013
There is a photo of me in my high school yearbook. I am standing to the side by myself and watching the tug of war competition. It was an exciting contest. I wanted to join in but I was afraid to be embarrassed because I was the fat girl. I didn't have any body confidence. I think how many events and opportunities I have stood by and watched when I wanted to be in there kicking up a storm. I have been self conscious for too long. I have convinced myself that I am destined to be a watcher, particularly in athletic activities. So, I believe that is my goal for the year. * I will develop and nurture body confidence. * I went to the doctor today and got an order for physical therapy. I am stopping the negative talk and building strength. It's a challenge at my age and weight (60+ and 400+). But I am sick of sidelining myself.
By the way, that 17 year old "fat girl" weighed 150 lbs. What a waste!