Amputating My Unhealthy Attitude

Wednesday, January 09, 2013

2012 was unequivocally the worst year of my life. While dealing with my tumor removal from December 2011, I lost my job in January. In May, I dropped out of college right before finals, resulting in the failure of all of my classes. At the end of May, my depression hit an all-time low and I attempted to take my own life, resulting in a 10 day stint in the mental hospital, where I was diagnosed as bi-polar. Enter anti-depressants and anti-psychotics, which make you gain weight. In October, I was informed that my tumor came back with a vengeance, and while it was benign, the best course of action was to amputate. In December, I had my left pointer finger amputated and the corresponding metacarpal removed.

But you know what? My bandages came off on New Year's Eve and I'm stoked with the results on my hand. I'm still recovering some function and re-learning how to do certain things (mainly typing with speed and accuracy) but other than that, my hand feels great and I'm really happy that I got to start off 2013 with it feeling that way.

My bi-polar is stable. I have a loving boyfriend and family. I have a job I enjoy. I have great friends.

So all of the negativity and awful circumstances that contributed to my 20 pound weight gain this year are behind me.

Upward and onward, right? I started off today right. A great workout (Jillian Michaels' Ripped in 30), two tasty and healthy meals so far, and a good attitude looking forward to the good things that are going to happen this year.

Most people think that 13 is an unlucky number. It just so happens to be my lucky number so I know that 2013 is going to be the best year ever.

I'm cutting off all the bad thoughts, unhealthy ways, and negative attitudes. It's time to shine.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • 45AQUA-MAN
    That's an awesome blog and you're doing great. I think most people would want to end their life even without the bipolar. I know what you went through and are going through has made you a stronger person. I'm glad you have good support.

    Dennis emoticon emoticon
    1857 days ago
    Kind of puts my negatives in prospective! 13 is my lucky number too i was born on the 13th so we can both rock 2013 and enjoy all life has to offer.
    1866 days ago
    outstanding blog. emoticon
    what an awesome attitude.how can you possibly fail at weightloss or any other dreams you have with this outlook.

    just remember you aren't doing this alone.god,jesus and the holy spirit is walking with you,dieting withyou,and loving you.

    i felt better just reading your blog this morning.
    best lesleyanne.
    1867 days ago
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