Tuesday, January 08, 2013
I am such a hugh fan of the Biggest Loser. While most people see that as overweight people trying to get skinny or lose weight I see more than that. I see people with emotional issues that cause the weight gain. Emotionally the issues keep them stuck. They can't be the real person they are designed to be. It causes them to eat from hurts, wounds and what negative comments they tell them selves. I do know that the negative stuff can cause you to be stuck or you can change your thinking and use it to motivate yourself in a positive way. I get that. I have and am continuing to do that. When I have woken up felt angry about something I remind myself that I can run those feelings off on my treadmill. I also do know that I can share those feelings with Jesus. Both are positive things to do.
Now today I so do feel that way. Because of my mental illness I feel like damaged goods. I do know that mental illness is hard to live with but also hard to be around. So the feelings of damaged good can cause me to make bad food choices. But I don't want that to happen as I do know that food doesn't solve the issue. I do know that positive choices are the best way to go. So after I write this I have a date with my weights. I do know that working out for me helps me to feel better about myself. I do know that God can help with that too. I know that at the end of the day I have to live with myself, like myself and be ok with me. I do know that I am stronger that anything that is thrown at me. I can do this. Like I have told my sister it's not about the abuse it's about how you deal with it today. It's how you treat yourself, the good choices you make in life and how you handle the whole thing. It's not about being the victim it's about being a survivor. It's about the outcome. So for today my outcome it to become a healthier me on the outside and inside.