Tuesday, January 08, 2013
Turning 40 was worse than I thought for my body. Now here I am almost 44. I have been working out nearly consistently for 5 years, but the weight crept back on. My body aches, pains and is getting tighter (the wrong way) despite my stretching and moving. I did elliptical and a mix of other cardio at the gym for years, had an achilles tendon injury and started swimming instead. I felt great with it, but lost the muscle tone from the free weights and really gained weight during the 18 months I swam 3-4 times a week for an hour.
My DH gained all his back too, plus some. So he made the family resolution to increase our fruits and vegetables as a family. A good idea, but harder to implement than I thought. I will be re-adding in the exercise I've missed the last couple weeks with the chaos of Winter Break, but right now, trying to re-adjust to dieting again.
I often feel like this is all fruitless. I worked so hard before, and I didn't necessarily like the thought of living with that small amount of food for the rest of my life. I LIKE FOOD. I LOVE FOOD. I look forward to meals, I get excited when I find out we are going out to eat, or the catered lunch at work is Panera (Love that bread!). There are too many foods I really love. I spent the last 4 years hardly eating french fries, yet the weight came back. I eat so much less than I did 8-10 years ago, yet the weight is still there.
Do I want to be that teeny tiny skinny mini? No. But I wish it were easier to be closer to a healthy weight. I can't imagine what I'll be able to eat at 50, if I can't hardly eat at 40+. I find it a little depressing.
Sorry if this blog is depressing. I just needed a whine session.