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    EVWINGS   100,422
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In search of a hero....

Saturday, January 05, 2013

14 self- discovery blog challenge: A hero that has let you down. (write a letter telling them)

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Dear Mr. Edwards,

It has been a long while that I have lived with the disappointment I felt when I learned of all your deception and dishonesty. There was no way I could find a way to let you know without feeling pain and sick to my stomach. It has only been the past few months that I have been able to think of everything and not have incredible sadness envelope me. What you did to the American people with your actions is disgraceful at the very best. But what you did to Elizabeth and your family is far worse.

What bothers me most, I believe is how this had to impact Elizabeth's last day. She was such a brave graceful lady and deserved so much better than what you gave her. She stood by you no matter what, as did the voters, your backers, and members of your party. We all deserved better, too.

Your personal life is yours and you must live with that. You also must live with the consequences of your actions and dealing with your relationship with your God. I do not envy you these things, but you must accept responsibility for it all. You had so much going for you and threw it away for a "skirt" chase. As angry as i once was, I now only feel shame for you and pray you can somehow get your life straight once more.

You see, Mr Edwards, I thought you to be an honest candidate, something rare in today's world. What you did was prove to me the search must continue yet again. It was tough sticking up for you when your infidelities were whispered, but I honestly thought by the way you stood by Elizabeth when her breast cancer was first discovered that there was no way you could be so stupid as to commit adultery against her and God's law. I guess that was totally naive on my part and I really should have known better. I'll say though, you taught me a valuable lesson about trusting any of our "politicians".

With the passing of time I have come to forgive you for being human. It doesn't lesson the disappointment I feel, but it helps me spiritually to be able to do so. it wasn't an easy thing to do either, especially with Elizabeth's passing. But i had no responsibility for your actions and choices. You did all of that on your own. I wish you no harm or bad come to you. i do pray you can learn from you mistakes and sincerely ask and receive God's forgiveness. Hopefully your family is able to forgive you, too. it is sadly too late for Elizabeth, but i have to believe she was able to do so before you left the world you helped create for her.

Evelyn

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it is never easy when a hero has destructive behavoir that leaves you completely disappointed. After all my years of witnessing political deceit, I should be used to it, but i truly believed John Edwards was different. He was not and he has paid for his indescressions. I have been able to forgive, but i could never trust another word from his mouth. Have you ever had anyone that was a hero to you let you down? How did you handle it? Were you able to forgive?

Enjoy your Sunday. it is Epiphany in the Church year. It is also Cuddle Up Day. I do believe I can honor this one without any problems!!!

Peace Love Hope
Ev








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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

COACHPENNY 1/14/2013 11:38AM

    Heros do fail. You are right, he is human. Humans can be selfish and he has to live with the pain that he caused. It was amazing to see his oldest daughter stand behind him. Her losses are even greater than his and she found a way to forgive him.

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CHERIRIDDELL 1/8/2013 11:25PM

    Power corrupts and absolute power corrupts absolutely.

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KARIDIAN1 1/6/2013 9:23PM

    Too bad he made such bad decisions.

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KARIDIAN1 1/6/2013 9:22PM

    Too bad he made such bad decisions.

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CANNIE50 1/6/2013 5:00PM

    I, too, was taken in by John Edwards and was deeply disappointed to learn how dishonestly he lived, and how truly weak he is. I felt foolish for believing him. I don't view Elizabeth as a victim, though, because I think she was stronger and more shrewd than that. I think she was a remarkable woman but I think she put up with some things in a trade for the lifestyle and I wish she would have challenged him more because she was a formidable woman. I hope she is resting in eternal peace - God knows she earned it. I feel badly for their children - they have been through SO much pain. They have their mother's DNA, though, so I am sure they will rise above.

I don't have heroes so much as I have people I admire and one of them let me down recently. He is someone who helped me when I struggled, by believing in my ability to become stronger physically and mentally. He was my fitness instructor and became my friend and we formed a bond and had a mutually supportive friendship. Then, he was lured by the money and false promises of a multi-level marketing scheme. At first, he respected my lack of desire to get involved with this but as he got deeper and deeper into the culture of this company, he began his attempts to recruit me. It has caused me to dread hearing from him and I have lost respect for him. He has lost lots of friendships this way. I find it hard to believe the money is worth it.

Thank you for this blog. Take care.

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JAE_HENNINGTON 1/6/2013 11:41AM

  I had the same sentiments as you about john Edwards, When I first saw and heard him . I was impressed with him and thought he would be a good canditate for president. The heart of a human is deceptive. I guess thats why God says not to judge. Only God can know the heart of a person and thier intentions.. Elizabeth was so gracious.. I felt so bad for her that she had to go through all of this with her health, and her last days on earth..

in the end I think it is not up to us to forgive him, he will have to settle that with God.

I want to thank you for taking the time to pen your feelings in a blog.. writing always help settle things and get them out into the open.

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1CRAZYDOG 1/6/2013 11:20AM

    What a poignant letter you've written. It is so true. You put faith in the honesty of someone and when they betray that trust, no matter how they do it, there is definitely difficulty getting to the point of forgiving. However, my philosophy definitely is being forgiving, but forgetting . . . that's another issue all together. I feel like once trust is betrayed, to me, it is a huge lesson to be learned. So, forgiving is a good thing. It give US back our personal, rather than harboring ill feelings. BUT if you forget, to me, you also forget the lesson learned.

There have personally been times that I have had to be forgiven as well, so that puts it more in a positive view to be able to forgive.

Very thought provoking blog.

HUGS

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GINNJEN1974 1/6/2013 8:17AM

    Interesting idea for a blog.

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NEW-CAZ 1/6/2013 3:24AM

    Ev it seems to me, in the UK anyway, that we build people up only to knock them down. There seems to be an appetite to over publicise a person on the way up, relish in their success and then hunt out their dark side and skeletons/flaws and destroy them
The true heroes in my life are not celebrities, one was a teacher whom I much respected and still recall even now, one is a local lady who has done much for charity and indeed went on to earn and OBE in the Queen's Honours List a few years back.
There are heroes on here too! I am friends with one chap who has lost a lot of weight and has joined the SP coaches on seminars to motivate others to change their lives!

No body is perfect but it's those who shine without seeking publicity or recognition that I applaud.

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KASEYCOFF 1/6/2013 3:14AM

    Mmm hmm - well-written, Ev! I admired her so much and couldn't believe - regardless of the gap that probably exists between "public" and "private" - that he valued her so little.
emoticon

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1STATEOFDENIAL 1/6/2013 2:27AM

    I take the term "hero" in a different way than most. Many choose to call someone a hero and place them on a pedestal for all to see who they worship/believe in/think above others/etc. I've seen first-hand what happens to those who are put on the pedestal. I've seen the inner turmoil they constantly face in an attempt to live up to the status they've been given. I've seen how it tears them to pieces knowing they can never be the perfect person some want them to be. I've seen them damage relationships and hurt those they care about most because they need to push away people before they can leave and find new people to replace the holes. Because of that, I refuse to ever put anyone on a pedestal, ever. I know everyone is imperfect and flawed and no one deserves to be held up above others.

My view of a hero is someone who is willing to give up everything that matters to others. Soldiers are an example. Many soldiers end up mentally destroyed from what they've seen and done but choosing to face the realities is heroic. But they still shouldn't be put on pedestals - only given the help, care, and attention they need and deserve.

Since I never put anyone on a pedestal, I instead choose to be inspired by those who have qualities I wish I had. Those who are incredibly charitable, who are forgiving and loving beyond measure, and who have talent I can't even imagine inspire me to be try to be more than I am. Therefore, when their imperfections are revealed I am not affected by the loss of what I deemed perfect. When their flaws become clear and many would dismiss them, I find compassion because I know that they are not that different from me.

The last time I had someone I idolized so much that their imperfections could have affected me was when I was when I was a teenager. An actor I greatly admired (and crushed on) eased out of the limelight as he became greatly depressed. A few years later (with few roles) he committed suicide. If I hadn't come face-to-face with the sombre reality of the damage caused by the limelight in the few years prior, I would've been absolutely devastated by the loss. I realized that those friends I have who are in some shade of limelight need to be kept grounded, knowing that people care and will not allow them to be on a pedestal. I've been thanked more than once for helping keep a friend grounded.

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