I'm back

Friday, January 04, 2013

I've creeped up to the 180's again. My clothes hurt and I don't like the way I look or feel. Since its January and the whole world is dieting, or at least talking about dieting this seems like a good time to jump in again. After a couple of days of clean eating I have lost enough water weight to cross the 180 divide again. My next goal is to get down to what my driver's license says I weigh--175. Ultimitely, I'd like to get down to the high 150's. At that weight, all my clothes fit, I look good and I feel a lot less jiggley.

I am trying to embrace journaling. I hate that I have to do it, but damn! It ALWAYS works for me. Why do I struggle so mightily to spite myself? Does it take that long? No. I think it makes me conscious that I will never be a person who can eat whatever she wants with no consequences. But isn't that true of just about everybody? I'm sure there are people in the world who can eat whatever they want and never gain weight, but they are probably a very small minority. Look around--I don't see very many people who couldn't stand to lose a few pounds. Just quit belly-aching about doing it and DO IT.

Oh no, just received an email about baked goods being brought in today. Will stay strong and focused. Try, try, try.
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    I think we all have to do what works best for us - I don't "count calories" with the kind of stressed out, "OMG, I can only eat one leaf of lettuce for dinner now!" mentality. I "gamify" the whole thing. I try to stack as many nutrients into as few calories as possible, then go smack myself down a level when I see right there in my face just how many crap calories there are in a Double Quarter Pounder. But, you know, it is what it is. I took the hit for a large popcorn and a once-a-year Vanilla Coke at Les Mis last weekend. I'm a big girl - tracking it just helped me stay on track and not have to re-roll my character. ;)

    Journaling, or as some of us like to call it, blogging, works for me, too. I think it's not just a question of "clean eating" - that's easy enough if you don't worry about getting too creative and having any FUN with it. (I don't have time or energy to make my own cheese and yogurt, for instance.) But what triggers those weird binges of utterly MINDLESS eating? Is it boredom, hormones, some unacknowledged emotion? Heck if I know. Sometimes I find the answers, though, in writing.

    Oh, and Jodie? My mom could eat whatever she wanted - and then have seconds and thirds - and not gain weight to save her life. Literally. Be careful what you wish for. I wouldn't trade her her issues for my extra pounds!
    1835 days ago
    Hi Jodie! I've not been on Spark pretty much since I decided I preferred the primal way of doing things - Spark didn't support that very well. But between you and Holly, I'm willing to start again and see if it works better.

    I don't think you really need to journal as much as you need to be mindful of clean eating. Did you see that thing I posted on FB about calorie counting being an eating disorder? It's the avoidance of mindless eating that we all have to work on. Of course counting calories and journalling have that effect, but there's got to be a better way, say I.

    Wanna help me look for it?? emoticon
    1836 days ago
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    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.

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