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Why losing weight this time ended up being different...

Thursday, January 03, 2013

I'm a little emotional saying goodbye to 2012 and saying hello to a new year with new challenges.

2012 was a HUGE year for me, because I lost 125 pounds and gained a whole new life for myself that I never thought was possible. However, this blog entry is not about me getting all sentimental and dramatic about the changes in my life. This entry is about something I wanted to share that most people would find surprising...

When I saw my family at Christmas, I really didn't hear anything about my appearance. And for the first time in my life, I was fine with that. When I told my co-workers about this, they were very surprised, but I also live in an area where people tend to be a lot more demonstrative with their emotions than my family is. I'm far and away the most demonstrative person in my family when it comes to expressing my feelings, and it was something I struggled with for years, since my expectations from my family were a lot greater than the reality of the situation.

Yes, the last time I saw my dad and my brother and his family prior to my trip a week and a half ago, I was at my fattest point EVER. The last time I had seen my mom was in May when I was still over 200 pounds. But they really didn't say anything about the dramatic changes in my appearance when they saw me this time. However, they also didn't say much of anything when I was at my fattest either. They love me, no matter what the package wrapping looks like; they just want me to be happy.

I talked to my mom about this last night and how it wasn't a big deal to me like it was in the past, because I know that ultimately, I lost the weight for ME. NOT to impress anyone or make anyone else happy or to improve my dating prospects, but for one person and one person alone: ME. My own sense of accomplishment and the knowledge that I can do so many more things that were so difficult before eclipses any compliment that I may receive. Granted, I'm grateful to receive the compliments, but that's not why I did this.

So I look back on 2012 and feel good that not only am I in a healthier body, I have a healthier mind, with an attitude of gratitude, and less of a need for external validation. That is priceless.
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CTHOMURE 4/1/2013 11:27PM

  You have done so well, you are an inspiration!

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CASSANDRA1 1/29/2013 11:35AM

    Wow, what an accomplishment! You are a great inspiration.
I, too am in Memphis.

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ADAGIO_CON_BRIO 1/4/2013 4:57PM

    You had a great year and I am mightily impressed. Keep it up! emoticon


We went to see some friends not long ago. I had lost 36 pounds and my husband had lost about 5 pounds--he has been ranging about from 140-150 and up and down for a few decades. Well, they raved about how much weight he had lost and said nothing to me.
I was bemused and not offended. Because I know the numbers!

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ANDREAG89 1/4/2013 3:08PM

    What fantastic accomplishments you've achieved in 2012. Thanks for sharing your story and for letting us all know that it's possible. Great work, and best wishes in 2013!

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LOVESTOWALK49 1/4/2013 11:08AM

    Best of luck. Have a good year. emoticon

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ELAYNE39 1/4/2013 10:00AM

    Congratulations. Fabulous journey! Wonderful accomplishment. You seem to have it right!

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NUOVAELLE 1/4/2013 9:31AM

    That's a wonderful attitude! A balanced mind in a balanced body!
I'm wishing you all the best for 2013!
emoticon

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CARRAND 1/3/2013 8:30PM

    Wonderful blog!

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DARLENEK04 1/3/2013 6:55PM

  Congratulations on your loss of weight and also on the great sense of self
you have....you did it for you....which is what we also should do.

Blessings, Happy New Year,
Darlene

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JEANSHEP2 1/3/2013 5:27PM

    What a wonderful attitude...and 2013 should look all ways different for you.

Great thoughts for we who are more demonstative than others around us.

God bless.

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MAGGIEROSEBOWL 1/3/2013 4:58PM

    Wow--what a great attitude you have. I tend to expect too much from others. I want them to gush over me, make a big deal out of my weight loss and laud me with praise. I realize some people do not have that in them, and to them, MY weight loss is not the over-riding factor in their life, like it is in mine.

I like your reasoning, that even though your family didn't say much about your weight loss, they also made no comment when you were heavy. They loved you anyhow. My husband is kind of like that. he has loved all the accolades I have received since my weight loss, and all the media attention, but is a little embarrassed that I am so willing to share (IN PUBLIC) how fat I actually was and how miserable and unhealthy being that fat made me. However, he never bugged me about being obese. He loved me through thick and thin. He always made me feel desirable and that says a lot about how much he loves me I think. He told me once that he saw beyond the fat, he saw what was inside. I'm glad he did, or we might not still be together and still madly in love after 42 years.

So even though today he might not make a big deal about how much better I look, I'm going to take your attitude and remember how good he was to me when I was heavy and realize that to be demonstrative is just NOT in his make-up. And like you, I'm okay with that. Cause I know he will love me no matter what--and I am so grateful for that kind of love.

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TINAJANE76 1/3/2013 4:39PM

    That's fantastic! I wish you all the best in 2013!

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LEB0401 1/3/2013 3:19PM

    emoticon Fantastic blog.. you did it for YOU and that's gotta feel good!

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EILEEN828 1/3/2013 3:18PM

    Well I think you got it right, they just want you to be happy. Perhaps when they get a little more used to the new you they may finally say something about it. Right now it probably felt as awkward as would saying something when you were overweight. They didn't want to appear as if that would matter to them. That's because you being you is far more important to them. I do understand the need for a high five though. So I and everyone else here, are giving you one! Great job and good luck for the new year! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Comment edited on: 1/3/2013 3:19:36 PM

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MCONFESSOR 1/3/2013 2:27PM

    It's great to be able to see how importantly and profoundly mental, emotional, and physical health are so intertwined. Congratulations on the weight loss and the self discovery!

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CHEETARA79 1/3/2013 2:15PM

    That IS priceless. You are awesome!

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BIGPAWSUP 1/3/2013 2:13PM

    You had an amazing 2012! Hope 2013 eclipses your wildest dreams!

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CATRIPL 1/3/2013 2:04PM

  Congratulations! Here's to a great 2013!

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JULIE700 1/3/2013 1:45PM

    Congrats on your success! emoticon

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MIATIA1 1/3/2013 1:42PM

    Congratulations on all your successes mind and body... HAPPY 2013, may it bring you all that you hope and work for...... emoticon

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SCRAPPINPOLLY 1/3/2013 1:29PM

    Here's hoping 2013 is just as wonderful a year for you as 2012.

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