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    SHRINKING_SARA   29,363
25,000-29,999 SparkPoints

Can we stop it with the fat bashing this time of the year?

Thursday, January 03, 2013

One thing I hate about New Years is New Years Resolutions. I hate them. I don't do them. I think they are a horrible idea. Just like dieting, spur of the moment decisions with little to no planning lead to failure... which makes people feel like failures.

Right now there's a lot of people committing to lose weight. That's great. We should support them. What do I hear non-stop though? People who regularly go to the gym complaining about "all the fat people" showing up to use "their" equipment. I can't understand why people feel its okay to bash fat people -- especially at this time of year.

I even had to yell at my boyfriend as we were walking in the mall. My mall just got a new Torrid, directly across from Lane Bryant. He made a stupid comment about making it easy for the fatties to shop. He knows I used to be fat. Hell HE used to be fat. I called him on it, reminded him I used to shop there and his "but now you don't and you're sexy" reply just made me even madder. I basically told him those kind of comments weren't allowed. You know what -- it made me feel better too.

So from now on, if anyone starts complaining about fat people taking over their gym or their space or anything, I'm calling them on it. I hear a lot more fat bashing now that I've lost weight. I hate it. It almost confirms what I used to think people were saying about me. I think we should all stand up and put those irritating people in their place. I haven't lost weight to join some special skinny club. I lost weight to be healthy, and anyone who had a little extra weight (read--basically everyone) shouldn't go around trying to make people feel bad just to feel better about themselves.

I know this is basically all bullying, but I can't stand the fact that January has basically become a fat bashing month for all comics/people who think they are funny/jacka$$es in the world.

*end rant.

Member Comments About This Blog Post:
KONOHA-NIN 1/7/2013 11:47PM

    Ugh, agreed. I also hate fat bashing (or skinny bashing for that matter). It really sucks that some people have to be so judgmental and mean.

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MONICAKH31 1/7/2013 8:05PM

    I could not agree with you more. It is so disheartening to hear people make comments about a persons weight. We have no idea what is going on in another person's life and the size of a person's waist line, be it smaller or larger, does not determine their character or heart.
Some don't realize that some of those words open up wounds that where made when people were growing up and being bullied. Some don't realize how hard it takes to get the courage to even step foot in a gym. We need to build people up to help them succeed.
I plan on leaving little sticky notes with encouragement throughout the locker room at the gym for the next couple of weeks so they know they have cheerleaders on their side.

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    I loved this blog entry and it's exactly how a lot of us feel about the whole thing. Some days it's hard enough dragging my butt into the gym (and I've been going for the last year or so now) thinking what some of the other gym regulars may be saying about me (or others.) I just think why can't we all quit judging, skinny or fat and just be individuals. Okay, enough of my rant!

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ZZTATIZZ 1/4/2013 9:44AM

    I'm glad you spoke up, and your example has inspired me to do the same. :)

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STLADEE 1/3/2013 3:20PM

    Good for you Sara for saying something! I have to say the comments is ONE of the reasons I didn't join the gym when I began my journey last year in DECEMBER b/c I didn't want to be lumped into the group of NYR (new year resolutioners) I don't do resolutions either. That's why I waited until June to join the gym. It does get nerve racking to want to go to the gym and know it will be crowed with NYRs and it will be hard to find the machine but it will be AWEsome to see who will stick with it too!

Anyhoo, I am not at the point where people will make comments about "fat people" to me but best believe if and when they do I will DEF call them on it!

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JR0124 1/3/2013 3:15PM

    I've been going crazy about this as well. We should be supporting those people that are trying to change their ways instead of complaining about them taking up your favorite treadmill!

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SPASTASTIC 1/3/2013 2:14PM

    Oh gosh, I just made a blog about this topic too. People can be so mean-spirited!

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CRISSA1669 1/3/2013 1:46PM

    Very true blog! My husband and I were driving home from Costco last night and the 24 hour fitness across from it was PACKED...we have never seen so many cars in the parking lot. New Years is such a set up for all of the Jenny Craig/Weight Watchers/NutraSystem/Dr Oz and whoever and whatever else to tout their food/product/service...Marketeers are amazing...and the stuff really works to get us to spend our money..I know I feel for it in times past. I have had similar experiences as you with the "fat bashing" comments now that I am not considered "fat" anymore(hate even saying that)...I've experienced it on airplanes this past year, at 2 conferences with at least 4 different people (none ofwhich knew I was formerly OBESE), man what a trip. I am very mindful and will speak up when I hear it. I'm all about trying to lose weight, gain health etc...but sadly a lot of people will fall flat, just heard a statistic that said New Years Resolutions only last about 10 days :(...I hope a majority of people will finally decide now's the time and incorporate healthier habits and exercise into the life....but fat bashing.....No WAY!! Thanks for the good blog!

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    You are so right. It drives me crazy that "fat" people are the only people that everyone feels it's okay to still make fun of. I've heard SO many times... "oh, well, we can make fun of them because being fat is a choice." ARGH!! Yes, I totally made a conscious choice to be 250 lbs (eye roll). Good lord, people can be so stupid. All of the "fat bashing" just makes heavy people want to stay at home even more. I know people who are heavy that don't want to go to a gym until they lose at least 20 lbs. Seriously?? How are people supposed to get in shape when they get ridiculed for trying??
I'm with you on the boyfriend thing. I give mine crap all the time for comments... I always tell him I'm a fat girl, and he always says - "you've NEVER been THAT big". Like it matters.

I'm so angry, haha!! Stuff like that drives me nuts!!

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NIKKICOLE83 1/3/2013 1:04PM

    I was just thinking that this morning. It bothered me before because I was much heavier and people assumed that just because they hadn't noticed me before, that I was a Resolutioner and I would be gone by Valentine's Day. It does become stressful trying to find a parking spot at the gym or space in group fitness class with the influx of people, but it is what it is. It will happen every year in every city or town. I think we should try to be kind and give an encouraging smile to those who are trying so that they keep coming back throughout the year.

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LOLATURTLE 1/3/2013 12:52PM

    I feel fortunate that I haven't run in to much of this yet this year, but I agree completely.

I did make an offhand comment about the gym the other day, but it was about people with a lack of courtesy (or who just haven't learned gym etiquette yet). I hope the new people at my gym stay; I just hope they stop hanging their coats on the equipment and put them in the locker room where they belong. emoticon

I hate the fat bashing. You know what else I hate? When people assume I am in Fat Club with them, by which I mean that I want to listen to them complain and/or join in bashing "skinny b*****s". If it's not okay to call overweight people slobby or lazy or disgusting because of body size, what makes it okay to call someone a "bimbo" or a "whore" because of their size or shape? I don't agree and I don't appreciate it and I don't want to hear it.

It makes me sad and mad whenever I see it on Spark People, and maybe I will join you in calling it what it is. I would be really happy to never see or hear the phrase looking like (someone) "needs a sandwich," ever again as long as I live.

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MERAINA 1/3/2013 12:35PM

emoticon High Five on this one!

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POISONGIRL999 1/3/2013 12:34PM

    Well said!

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REDDBETSY 1/3/2013 12:29PM

    I love this! I feel the same way!
I agree, call them out on it!
There used to be a move that was used to fight racism in politically delicate situations-- it was called 'disapproving face'. We need to claim this move to use on bosses who make fat jokes. So even if you are in a situation where it would be a bad idea to say WTF, you can still make the disapproving face and let them know that you aren't just going to laugh along.

And you guys have a Torrid? Sweet!

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IAMZBEE 1/3/2013 12:29PM

    Very true. I think my only gripe about the increase in people at the gym after New Year's is... Did they REALLY have to wait until January 1st to start going....??? I mean seriously, what makes January 1st any more special than October 1st??? Aside from sizes.... i never bash and always compliment the large individuals for trying and giving their all. If we're in group class and I see they're struggling, I always try to give them a compliment and tell them that it always gets easier (as I once was in their shoes).

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ADARKARA 1/3/2013 12:26PM

    I concur. emoticon

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PATNSL07 1/3/2013 12:24PM

    So true! Perfectly said! Whenever I see a heavier set person at the gym, running etc. I think good for you, you've gotta start somewhere!!

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LEB0401 1/3/2013 12:22PM

    Very, very good points. emoticon

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