Wednesday, January 02, 2013
Told my family that one of my New Year’s Resolution was to be less critical. Before I criticize my Wife, two Daughters or my Son, to help their perspective, I will figuratively walk a mile in their shoes. My family is pleased with this Resolution, feeling that I am sincere and thanked me for it. Wife said she will remind me of it when she feels it is necessary to do so.
I am happy with this New Year’s Resolution. I know that one of the secrets of success is sincerity. However no one is always sincere. So, once you can fake sincerity you've got it made.
My intent for my New Year’s Resolution to be less critical of my family is that each time I feel the urge to be critical of any family member and there is not foul weather outside, I will go for a mile walk without any other family member. I may take one or two of our three dogs, but no human family members can join us. Once I am a mile away from my starting point, I will say all of the criticisms I want. Then I will take a few deep breaths, do some neck and shoulder relaxing exercises and walk the mile back to my starting point.
If there is foul weather outside, I will go to the gym get on the treadmill and go for a few miles. Then I will get in my auto, let the criticisms fly, then take a few deep breaths, do some neck and shoulder relaxing exercises, listen to at least one song I like and then return home.
If the gym is closed then I will be going to the basement to exercise, criticize in a low voice (so I am not overheard upstairs).
My New Year’s Resolution to be less critical of my family will act as a trigger to initiate more exercise and allow me to release stress in an environment that will not cause me or family members additional stress.
Along with my need for an exercise trigger, an additional cause for my New Year’s Resolution to be less critical of my family was a ride with my youngest daughter in her car. I had not been in the car in months and during the ride I kept hearing banging from under the car. I asked her how long she had heard the noise and she told me she did not know, but since the car still ran fine, it was not a problem. We went to a mechanic I trust and were told an engine mount had broken. I had my daughter get the car repaired and lectured her about vehicle reliability and safety.
This ability to ignore obvious vehicle warning signs is shared by my Wife, oldest Daughter and Son. I have a number of stories similar to the one above.
I have been battling this train of thought concerning vehicles in my family for years.
In the past I have claimed that the children inherited this trait from my Wife. If I try to make that claim today, then I have at least a 2 mile walk to do.
Another item that added to my development of my New Year’s Resolution to be less critical has been our recent remodeling of the kitchen. Now that you know that, I must provide a little background so you can appreciate the process that we have been going through.
I tend to be what I believe is the typical male. The colors exist in my world are white, black, pink and the seven primary colors of red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo and violet that exist in a rainbow. These colors can come in shades of light or dark. There no turquoise or lime color in my world. From a color perspective, my Wife refers to me as a Neanderthal or Caveman depending on her mood.
I have to prove to my Wife on a regular basis that I am not color blind. My wife will ask me what I think of a piece of clothing and in my response if I mention the color, usually the test will begin.
“What color did you say this is?” she will inquire.
Knowing that to my Wife I am wrong, I respond, “Red”
“It is not red! This color is burgundy.”
“Ok, dark red”
“You are color blind” she says as she identifies something else within eyesight and says, “What color is this?”
“Ok, you’re not color blind, you are a Neanderthal” (or Caveman depending on her mood)
I told my family I may be leaving them frequently to keep my New Year’s Resolution to be less critical. They all told me since they will remind me of the New Year’s Resolution to be less critical often; they know I will frequently have to take New Year’s Resolution breaks.