Wednesday, January 02, 2013
I did attempt to post a blog the other day but the Internet ate it.
Ok so I did it! 30 Days AF! I am surprised that I did it and now, I don't want to go back (but more on that later). So here are the results! The following results are just from cutting out alcohol. I did not intentionally change my diet and I actually worked out less due to the holidays. I lost 6 pounds and 2.5 inches! 2.5 inches is huge for me, I did P90 for 2 months a while back and only lost .5 inches! I have REAL hope for once and it feels amazing. I noticed during this 30 days that I ate A LOT less. I have never really struggled with food but when I had a hangover, I ate more in hopes the nutrients would help the hangover. So while I didn't change my diet, I did eat less calories as a result of no drinking. Of course, I have been drinking a lot less water since I don't feel like I am dying of thirst everyday now but I can fix that.
I did drink on New Years. I had planned it so I do not feel guilty. I didn't get wasted or anything but I had enough to have a hangover. While I was drinking, I was thinking "I don't really want this ..I would have just as much fun without the booze". It was one of those situations where friends kept buying the drinks so I kept drinking them because it was in my hand. I never once actually went to get my own beer because I didn't really want it! But I am glad I did drink because I got to really evaluate it..and the hangover.
The next day, the hangover was mild but I was starving! All day I ate. I never do that (well..sober me at least). I think I have learned that I really don't want to drink now..I felt kind of.. beneath the sober people at the New Years party. I was jealous of them (well..sort of..they were miserable because they were sober against their will. Meds, pregnancy, ect). I almost felt embarrassed to be drinking for some reason. Before, I wore my high alcohol tolerance like some kind of badge of honor. Now I realize that it was just flashing everyone my biggest weakness. I do not want to come off to others like that ..why did I ever think that alcoholism was something to brag about? It isn't very classy to keep up with the guys, it is embarrassing! I have a whole new perspective now and I don't think I could have seen things so clearly had I not went 30 days straight AF. I just had such a good month being AF and really enjoyed my social life more sober. I finally feel free of this hold beer had on me. I can drink if I want..but I dont want to! I think (for me at least), saying "You cannot have beer ever again" would make me want to rebel but knowing I can have it if I want gives me the control..and I don't want or need it anymore.
So now that I've met this goal, it is time to really focus on weight loss. I am hoping it just melts off now that I am not drinking 3500 calories a week. I am going to start tracking my food again and logging my work outs. I spoke with my running buddy and we are stepping up on the 5k training. We agree that its all mental stuff that is holding us back. We have the Zombie 5k in May and a Dirty Girl Mud Run in September so we are ready to get hard core!