Tuesday, January 01, 2013
i seem to have all the answers in front of me i just need to ask the right questions. i now see that yes my boyfriend is hard on me but at the same time i know hes doing it because he cares. he did tell me i had some great qualities about me, i just need to find a way to bring that person out again. im hurting from the removal of my port, but i refuse to use that as an excuse not to work on me. i know that by just staying here locked up in my apt and never going out i am missing out on all the things life has to offer me. im learning the hard way that my boyfriend just wants me to at least try. hes not looking for me to become a barbie doll figure ... but just to loose the weight and maintain a healthy average weight. the other thing i have been dealing with is my anti depressant is no longer helping my depression i need to switch to something else. I guess your body gets immune to a certain kind of med and it no longer work so i guess thats whats happening to me.