Something I wrote on October 1, 2012 on a group from Facebook
Tuesday, January 01, 2013
October 1, 2012
I just wanted to share my weight loss (or lack thereof) with everyone. Just to show that you're not alone in your struggle to be healthy or just when you think "No one understands"... Try me. :)
I have always been a heavy girl. I’m Irish/Scottish & grew up on a farm in Nova Scotia. I’m heavily built & 5’8”. I don’t think I can ever weigh less than 150lbs without looking anorexic.
I remember weighing 118lbs in grade 5. That’s right – at 10 years old I was a big girl. I was made fun of at school. Puberty thinned me out a bit. By the time I graduated high school, I was 160lbs, but very athletic. There’s a picture of me kicking a soccer ball in my yearbook & I think I look good – you can see the muscles.
For college, I took Multimedia Design then moved to Alberta to look for work. Gone was my love for sports & in came online gaming. I bloated to 305lbs when I became pregnant with my first at 24. I didn’t really care what I looked like while at my computer – I was a gaming chick! No one could see what I looked like through a computer screen. Due to severe morning sickness, I lost 20lbs with that pregnancy & 22lbs with my second.
I started Herbal Magic in the summer of 2006. I was 273. I exchanged my MMRPG’s for time with my kids & started walking & eating less. I had a shake for breakfast & lunch (I hated the bars), fruit for snacks & a healthy supper. By Christmas, I had shed 59lbs & a lazy husband. At 214, I could buy clothes in ‘regular sized’ people stores! I didn’t have to pay extra for plus sizes! Because I was a single mom, I couldn’t afford the Herbal Magic program anymore, but followed its rules & was able to drop another 10lbs the following year. December 2007 – 204lbs.
I became a SaHM again in January 2008 & became pregnant in March. At my first prenatal, I was already over 250lbs again. After I had my 3rd baby in October, I was back up to the 270’s. Baby #4 came in 2010 & I was back up just under 300. December 2010 – 293lbs.
I really wanted to get this weight under control, so I applied for the YMCA Opportunity Fund. I could go work out & they had Childminding at the Castledowns location. After a month, there was no change in my weight so I got discouraged & quit. The kids continued to take swimming lessons with the remainder of the membership, but I didn’t go back.
In March 2011, I started working again - at a Bakery! Evil! Part of our job was to quality control items. That ment eating them! I think it might have been just being on my feet all day, but I still lost 20lbs in a few months.
In August 2011, I got a job working at The Running Room warehouse. They encouraged a healthy lifestyle, even among their employees. There was no smoking on the premises. The vending machines had only healthy options. Plus, we had a 50% discount on all their products. I lost an amazing 50lbs in just 3 months. My manager was charting my weight. I think he wanted me to be a success story LOL. I was 224lbs when I found out I was pregnant in October & brought in a note from my doctor asking for work modification because I had been lifting boxes up to 100lbs. They couldn’t so I went back to the Bakery, doing cake decorating. I had my baby in June & here I sit at 252.
June 1998 - 160lbs
July 2004 - 305
July 2006 - 273
December 2006 - 214
December 2007 - 204
March 2008 - 250
October 2008 - 275
December 2010 - 293
August 2011 - 273
October 2011 - 224
June 2012 - 234
October 2012 - 252
January 2012 - 259
All this yo-yoing can’t be good for my body. I don’t want my kids suffering from self-esteem issues like I have my entire life. I want to be around to see my children’s life events. I want them to have & enjoy a healthy lifestyle.
I don’t want to die because of some weight related issue – heart attack, diabetes, stroke – or side effect of the food I’ve chosen to eat. I had a cousin who died at 36 because of his size. I don’t want my kids to be sedentary like myself. I don't want to shop at plus size clothing stores anymore.
I want to feel like I did when I reached 214 in 2006. Even though that’s still big by most standards, it was small for me. I felt empowered, strong, sexy, desirable, & most of all not embarrassed by who I was.
Move more & eat less crap. It’s no big secret – but why is it so dang hard?