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BOBCATGIRL76
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Day 396- Been Away for a While

Tuesday, January 01, 2013

*sigh*

It's been a while.

First, thank you for all the thoughts and prayers. After my Grandma fell on December 17, she earned her angel wings on December 29. It was a very sad two weeks, and I absolutely stopped caring about what I was eating or doing. It is comforting to know that she is now no longer in pain, and in a better place with my Grandpa.

Due to the blizzard and constantly being at the hospital/Hospice, I didn't exercise. And I paid for it.

I, according to a new scale at my parents' house, gained 9 pounds. I'm sure some of this is water weight, due to eating crappy salty fatty food. But still. 9 pounds.

What I'm thankful for is that I'm ready to refocus. Some people have deaths in the family and fall off the wagon for months, or even years. I'm glad mine was only two weeks.

It may take me a few months to get back to the 182 I was at, or it might take me a few weeks, depending on how focused I am, but what I know now is that I'm back to being active on Spark People.

I'm going to try to catch up on your blogs, start tracking all my food again, and get back to exercising regularly.

My boyfriend, J.D., played his last collegiate football game on December 28. It was his only game I've ever missed, but he won the Independence Bowl vs. U-Lousiana Monroe 45-14. If you watched, you might have even seen him get a 15 yard penalty for Unnecessary Roughness? LOL. It was a stupid call, but he said he only got it so his name would be on ESPN.

Now, he's doing a modified Paleo Diet which I think will definitely help me stay on track.

I just want to say, sorry for letting you down and being inactive for a while. I feel bad about the 9 pounds, but I promise I won't have them for long.

Thank you for all your continued support.

I love you, Sparkfriends! Happy New Year!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • MARKATSPARK
    emoticon
    366 days ago
  • BEVERLYB1989
    I'm so sorry for your loss. I just lost my grandmother a couple months ago and it was very hard. You are amazing for getting back on track after only 2 weeks, and I'm sure the weight will come right off so don't even worry about it. Good luck!!
    1359 days ago
  • ENDERLI
    I'm so sorry for your loss. I know how hard it is to lose someone.... Please don't apologize to us for "letting us down" that's crazy talk! You are an inspiration to ALL of us. Grandma is in a beautiful place with peace and unimaginable love. There is an awesome book called "Heaven is for Real" written about a father's son who had a Near Death Experience...it will ease your loss, and hopefully help in the grieving process.
    Don't punish yourself with getting off track. Just do the best you can right now. Hang in there, this pain will pass & God will bring you peace.
    Exciting that the boyfriend is going to do Paleo! Also awesome he played in a bowl game! wowza!
    Best wishes sweetie!
    xo
    1359 days ago
  • KATYDID412
    I'm so sorry for the loss of your grandma. You'll respark your Spark!

    Sending lotsa hugs your way.

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    1360 days ago
  • URBANAUDREYE
    I'm sorry about your loss. We lost my Grams about a year and a half ago. She was having Hospice care at home, and I don't know if that's really easier or harder, but I'm sure neither is easy. We don't want to ever lose our loved ones.
    1360 days ago
  • TUBLADY
    Sorry about your recent loss.
    I have been semi inactive lately do to a medical issue. but I too am back in full speed and I will be thinking you you.
    Sending you all good positive vibes.
    You can do it.
    Be strong, stay positive.
    Tisha emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1361 days ago
  • PICKYNICKI
    I'm really sorry to hear about your grandma. I know you will miss her, but at least you can find comfort in the fact that she has been reunited with your grandpa.
    One of my first reactions to reading your blog seems to be one that others had, you have not let anyone down at all. From my perspective you didn't even let yourself down because you got right back up and are doing what needs to be done to achieve and get back to your goals!
    You are amazing and I hope that I can find that type of thinking in myself to keep the weight off the next time I lose it. Good for you!
    I'm so glad to see you back!! emoticon
    1361 days ago
  • EVER-HOPEFUL
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    1362 days ago
  • BOOERDEM
    You have good perspective - just jump back in right where you are! There are many fellow Sparkers rooting for you - have a great year!!
    1362 days ago
  • ROBYNROSE26
    Sorry to hear about your Gramma

    emoticon
    1365 days ago
  • ROSEDAUGHTER5
    I just stumbled across your blog. I want to tell you that I think you are an inspiration.

    I am so sorry about your grandmother. I wish you blessings and healing.

    emoticon
    1365 days ago
  • CLPURNELL
    You didn't let anyone here down!!! Dealing with a loss is hard and it is normal to cope with food but the fact that you recognize it and are back and are getting back on track is awesome! i am sure you are going to make your grandparents super proud!

    emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1365 days ago
  • BIGFISCHY
    I'm sorry to hear about your grandmother. I had a loss in my family last year and fell of the bandwagon for months, so your motivation is really motivating me. I hope things start to get easier.
    1366 days ago
  • LISAN0415
    So sad to hear about ypour Grandma, You were lucky to have her in your life- I know so many people that never knew a grandma or didn't have a nice one in their life.

    Also, I just saw you already lost 2 more pounds! By next month that nine pounds will be gone and you will be well on your way to youpr ultimate goal!
    Best wishes for a Blessed New Year!
    Lisa
    1366 days ago
  • TARA_ADVENTURES
    Take care of yourself and do what you need to do. I wish you the best as you transition into the new year! emoticon
    1366 days ago
  • PROJECT_SUSAN
    I am sorry for your loss. emoticon

    I didn't see the game but sounds like a good one. Congrats to J.D. & team!

    I am sure those 9 pounds are quaking in their boots knowing that you are gunning for them! You will soon find them in the past! NO DOUBT!

    emoticon emoticon
    1366 days ago
  • NOSYROSY14
    I think we are all confident you will be successful.

    And congrats to J.D's successful football career. I did see his unnecessary roughness call!
    1366 days ago
  • MISTY_MOUNTAINS
    Sorry to hear about your Grandma. emoticon
    1366 days ago
  • WINDSONG28
    Things happen. And you've already said you're refocusing and that's what counts. Just keep pushing. You can do this
    1366 days ago
  • JENIYE_707
    I know u will get back into focus. We are still here for you. No matter what.
    Family still in my prayers. This is going to be our year. emoticon
    1366 days ago
  • NEVERORNOW
    You haven't let us down - I find it inspirational that you are back and ready to get back on track so quickly. Considering the past few weeks, I think you are doing as well or better than most of us under similar stresses. emoticon
    1367 days ago
  • WACFIT
    My sympathies. You are doing great all things considered. You live, you learn, you move forward. Good for you!
    1367 days ago
  • MOBYCARP
    Life happens to all of us, and most of us slip up at one time or another when it does.

    First, it is entirely normal and understandable that you would find the other issues in your life more compelling than SparkPeople over the past couple of weeks. You weren't able to be as active; that's OK.

    Second, you had a bad couple of weeks for weight. Gaining 9 pounds in two weeks isn't something you look forward to or brag about after it happens. But it *is* something you can learn from. You can get back on track and take care of that 9 pounds, and you can think about how it happened. Then, the next time life happens to you, maybe you'll be able to limit the damage better than you did this time.

    Welcome back!
    1367 days ago
  • SNOW_LEOPARD_74
    You have nothing to apologize for!! You can get back on track, I know you can and will!!
    1367 days ago
  • DETERMINED_ME
    You are amazing! So sorry to hear of your loss.


    1367 days ago
  • BIGREDANGEL
    I agree that you did NOT let anyone down!! We all have our ups and downs on this journey...no one ever said it'd be easy bc it's not!! The fact that you realized it and are getting back on track is all that matters!! You've been thru a lot lately and we're all here for you no matter what bc we've all had our times too!!
    emoticon
    Colleen
    1367 days ago
  • NOTSOFLUFFYDAD
    First of all, my deepest sympathies and condolences.
    Second of all, you did NOT let anybody down! We all have things that happen in life. Dealing with a death in the family, and the process of Hospice, is a very tragic event. I just went through it when I helped my dad go to sleep in our home at the end of August. That was the day that turned me around and made me realize I can change things for myself so that I don't end up sleeping too early in life.

    Please don't beat yourself up! I am here for you, we are here for you! Anything I can do to help you pick up and move forward, just ask ok?

    HUGZ
    Paul
    1367 days ago
  • GARDENSFORLIFE
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    God Bless You!
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    1367 days ago
  • MERRY_XMAS
    Your grandma watches you and protects you... This new year you have one more angel to take care of you, as you did for her in the last days...

    Be happy, I'm sure that's what she would want for you :)
    1367 days ago
  • COCK-ROBIN
    Thanks for the blog!
    1367 days ago
  • COCK-ROBIN
    Thanks for the blog!
    1367 days ago
  • KNYAGENYA
    Take care of yourself. emoticon
    1367 days ago
  • CAKEMAKERMOM
    You need to do what you need to do for you. Drink a lot of water and you'll drop at least half that weight right away. I'm glad you have the support here you need to get back on track quickly!
    emoticon
    1367 days ago
  • CATBEFIT
    You aren't letting anyone down -- you're coping with death of a loved one, and you have dealt with it the best you can.

    Congrats on your boyfriend's final football victory!

    GLAD you're back.
    1367 days ago
  • RADAMS0408
    I am so sorry to hear about your grandmother. I lost my sister almost a year ago unexpectedly, she was 35. I thought it would be my undoing, but it wasn't. I let myself grieve, but I knew I didn't want it to completely push me off the wagon, especially seeing how unhealthy she was, I used it as motivation. I guess the point is that we all need to be able to deal with life's changes and pain. It's OK to be down and out for a while and to allow ourselves time for healing. It's knowing how and when to begin building yourself back up that is important. All the best to you in 2013!. I am happy to say goodbye to 2012! :)
    1367 days ago

    Comment edited on: 1/1/2013 10:49:36 AM
  • STERRETT_DOWN
    My condolences about your gramma, but it is comforting to know that she's more comfortable now. Plus I'm sure you'll see her again. I don't believe the universe/God/what have you would ever keep people who love each other apart.

    Nine pounds - you can kick its rear. Good luck.
    1367 days ago
  • PANDASUE2
    You'll get them off, just take care of yourself and you'll get there. Sorry about your Grandma.
    1367 days ago
  • NASFKAB
    sorry about your grandmother you will get back on track
    1367 days ago
  • JENAE954
    We love and support you.
    1367 days ago
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