Got to love it. Its probably even true for most folks, myself included. But one can only but keep trying because giving up is the enemy. So once again.....I have made some decisions to live by and hope I can succeed.
I am not listing spiritual things because those are not things to try and aspire to, they are my food and cannot be missed.
1. Not spend so much time fixing other peoples relationship issues. If you want to constantly fight, do so, you no as much as I do about how to keep peace as far as it is possible with yourself.
I sadly draw to me people who are needy, yet angry at their needy state. I know I am strong, but being 52 Im finding I dont have as much to offer the "bottomless pit" emotional people.
Accepting that I cant fix the world, no matter how much I'd like to is something I must work on this year. My intentions are good, but I need to realize that those same people don't want a fix, just a sounding board to complain non-stop. I cant be that sounding board, I'm not a paid psychologist.
2. Get back to gardening, its therapeutic and beautifies the home and keeps me from engaging with others who are bored/angry/frustrated etc.
I get totally lost in that peaceful world of beauty that Jehovah God has given us. The plants, the birds, the sound of the running water feature are things I MUST get back to. Too much running around helping others and emptying myself on their behalf. There is no fix, and no thank you. Time to step aside and get back the peace and joy I once had in my life in an abundance.
3. Get back to sewing, its a hobby I thoroughly enjoy and also keeps me out of mischief makers paths. Keep drawing.
I enjoy being creative. Im not a seamstress by any means, but I still enjoy creating clothes out of a few meters of material. I get a sense of well being seeing the end result. I have always done hand drawn cartoon cards, then somewhere ran out of time because of helping the over needy and ended up just rushing into a store and buying cards. Its not that Im an artist by any means, just enjoy doing personalized cards and enjoy doing cartoons. It also keeps me busy and out of other peoples lives.
4. Prepare myself for the tragedy which is waiting in 2013. Do the best not to be floored by what will happen.
My daughter in law is in a lot of pain and cannot go on forever. In December, her oncologist said "6 months with an optimistic prognosis"....3 have already passed. I no they cant give a time, it could go on longer, but she's not working at living, she's working at dying. So I need to prepare my emotions for the inevitable and have a coping mechanism in place to assist my son and my 2.5year old grandson.
Thats it. One for each quarter. I wonder how I will manage with those. Time will tell.