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Inner Conflict

Monday, December 31, 2012

I have been reading the book, Full-Filled by Renee Stephens. I am finding a lot of interesting ideas in it. I decided to read the book through before starting with the 6 week program.
But of course, I can't help myself from dabbling in some of the exercises as I read!
At one point we are to fully imagine our ideal self. Another exercise led me to ask myself what negative feelings this ideal self held for me.

The ideal image of myself that popped into my head was one of a strong, powerful, muscular, lean, healthy, graceful, energetic woman. The negative thoughts that might hold me back that first popped into my head was PAIN. The second was that I would experience the negative effects of other women being jealous. The third was that the effort would begin taking over my whole life. Wow, that was interesting because I did see how this could make for an inner conflict and make me hold back!

Well, just after going through the mental exercise, I did decide to reintroduce strength training to my personal "fitness program" a few days ago. Even one work-out did make a difference. It seemed to start a chain of events that began to feel familiar...... It felt good to get blood flowing into my muscles. I felt the energy and the strength reawakened. I relaxed and slept better. The next day I woke up feeling good. I had a desire to make healthier food choices throughout the day. But now for the conflict.........
I had muscle soreness and tightness and fatigue. I had to develop a resolve to keep moving and everyday movements were a little stiff. That would require extra stretching.
To prevent overexertion and continuous fatigue, one needs to keep a basic level of strength training. That would mean exercising regularly. That means adding cardio training of some sort. That would mean continuing to make choices of getting off the couch and moving. That would mean making choices of activities that are more ACTIVE, not sedentary. Yes, that means making a lifestyle........and yes, that is kind of like being healthy and fit takes over your whole life.

Haven't had any contact with other women lately, but if I kept up my exercise and healthy eating, it does seem possible that they would be jealous. I know that I have experienced others' jealousy in the past for various reasons. And maybe it's my issue......I know I have a big jealous streak that I need to work on and I just project that out onto others.

Anyway, I am beginning to understand the concept of the inner conflict that can occur when we have a goal.

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • LE7_1234
    Isn't it interesting, when you start seeing *why* you're not making progress on that goal you tthought you wanted whole-heartedly?

    --or the IOWL podcasts--will really help you approach the conflict from both sides. Reframing the vision so it isn't as threatening, if that's what's needed. Addressing the fears on the other side, if that helps more.... The process can be really fun and rewarding, too, in all sorts of areas of your life.

    1906 days ago
    Interesting, just did some strength training myself and immediately felt the difference.
    Keep on balancing!
    1906 days ago
    That achy feeling is what keeps me going . . . . if I don't move it, my ol' bod just locks up and I feel worse... and if I lose it, it's too easy to surrender to the contented feeling of "I did it".
    1906 days ago
    Well expressed. I love that achy feeling the day after a workout, so satisfying, but I don't get it so much these days. I need to work out harder! Are you jealous yet?
    1906 days ago
    Think I need a little of your inner conflict!
    1906 days ago
    Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I like blogs like this! :)
    It's motivating to read what you said about how you enjoyed the strength training and slept better and relaxed - it's interesting to think about such 'chain' effects, thanks for mentioning it.
    A thought that came up with me as I read about the jealousy issue is 'so what if they are jealous?' - isn't that their problem?
    Maybe if you'd lose friends this would open the door to new friendships with women who applaud you instead of feeling envy...!
    My other thought was 'how about just doing the workout that made you feel good once every week?'. Or half of what you did twice a week... And just see how that goes. Maybe you won't be all that sore / overexert yourself.

    1906 days ago
    Thanks for that blog. It makes sense.
    Please share it on What's Happening in Our LIfe on our team. It might inspire others.
    1906 days ago
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