Saturday, December 29, 2012
I took Dixie out for her walk this morning and it was blowing snow and so cold. I had on my heavy sweat pants and a couple layers on top with a hat. My legs felt like I had on gauze instead of thick cotton. Next trip out will see me in my long johns and sweats and possibly another layer. Dixie jumped and pranced in the snow, loving every minute of it. I kept trying not to slip and slide on the icy/snowy pavement and sidewalk. We wound up walking in the grass instead so I wouldn't land on my butt. :-)
Getting the house in order more today. Hubby is building the fire for the day. I'm burning DVD's of Michael Sandel's lectures on Justice. I let lose the past few days and had whatever to eat. I reached a point where I was having this major internal struggle with myself over the whole diet thing. A lot like a kid who fights having to go to bed even though they are falling asleep standing up. I am reading Geneen Roth's book (don't remember the name) and so much is striking true with me and my adventures in diet land.
I do know I can't eat carbs with abandon. I do know that protein makes me fuller, longer and doesn't mess with my blood sugar. Those are my personal facts of life. It doesn't stop me from stomping my feet and holding my breath wanting to make life otherwise. I can see my life is a struggle between what I know and what I wish were true. I want my life back to where I didn't have to count every calorie that passed my lips. Where I just ate, enjoyed and lived life.
I think until I resolve this connundrum I'll be forever wavering back and forth between the two camps. For today, I am going to live my life like I want. Today, I want good, nourishing food. Preferably hot.
I also realized I suck at fitness in the winter time. My miles and steps have gone south along with the temps. I do better in sunlight, warmth and outside. In my younger days, I didn't mind being outside in snow and below zero temps all day or all night. These days, nope. Give me warm, beach, water and I'm a happy camper. My next item of business is to find a way to get my butt off the chair and moving around more than in the house.
Still waiting to hear about the job. Consensus is that I'll hear after the new year, everyone is probably off now. I am so ready for a change, for the better.
Happy New Year to everyone and I'm hoping to have more time to spend on here after the job things settle down.