Saturday, December 29, 2012
So I am a mom and a grandma. The majority of the cooking for Christmas celebration fell to me (kind of my role). Another part of my role surprised me. I found myself encouraging people to eat - "sure you don't want seconds," "plenty of food over there" - though for redemption, I didn't push. It was hard not to push though - I felt bad for my DSIL who passed on the special dessert one night (he is trying to drop some weight - struggles just like me). Then when I was "encouraging" DGS to get some dessert, DD let me know he was trying to watch on the sweets. My actions surprised me (though they are definitely who I have been in the past). As I think of what possible possessed me, I realize I always want people to be happy (not a new revelation - to me or my family). But "encouraging" the desserts - the message has to be "be happy, eat! Alright, there is an emotional response as I shovel it in. I guess I would call it "happy" - happy for the moment. However, being an encourager and knowing how hard it can be to pass on that temporary high for a better, long lasting healthy happy, I need to think about what I am encouraging. My DSIL has struggled with his weight as long as I have known him. In the past few years he has steadily lost weight and increased his physical activities. Do I really want to add to his struggles at the table? I was surprised by the words that came out of my mouth - but those are the words I would and did speak Christmases past. This has been a year of change and there are more changes to be made. My words reflect beliefs I hold - those beliefs that are not truths need to go. Yes, food can create a temporary high momentarily - however that temporary high does not equate long term happiness. It is easy to fall back into past behaviors - and past beliefs. Reminding myself of the truth, and how I want my actions and words to reflect the truth, will lead to the changes to becoming a "new" me.