Giving up is for quitters.
Thursday, December 27, 2012
I am about to start my very first HCG protocol with "Goodbye my Muffintop" Vibrational HCG drops. When I first heard of HCG drops I figured that they must be a ploy or a money grab because wrote off most "get thin quick" plans as such.
Except. My friend Kelly had done a few rounds and really had success. 60 pounds of success. I could use some success like that.
I am a single, working mother, who, lets face it, is keeping her head above water, but sometimes it feels like its just barely. I have a good job, own my home and love my life. I don't even really hate my body that much. I get dates with smart attractive men who also have good jobs and own their homes. So, overall...not too shabby.
Except. My ex-husband, (who no one needs to feel sorry for, for so many reasons) is getting married again. Fine. My job was a little shaky there, but has firmed up again, and I have just learned of a new, more exciting prospect, but that too would mean change. Great. And then there was the holiday stress. 15 people in my brothers 700 square foot house? Super! Top all that off with being fat? I was starting to feel like I wasn't in control of anything. So, I bought the drops.
They weren't cheap. 200 bucks to be exact. I couldn't even really afford them. I bought them just before Christmas, just when fees were due for swimming and karate and dance (all for my son and non negotiable). But I bought them anyways, knowing that if I bought them I wouldn't figure out a way to not do this protocol. Plus, if someone offered to take 30 pounds away and all you had to do was pay them 200 dollars, you would, wouldn't you? I did. There's more to it than that, of course, but put like that it was a bit of a "no brainer".
So tonight I will measure my body, just as it is, take my before pictures and dive in with nothing but hope and 200 dollars worth of weight loss potion.
The basis of my journey will be to really examine my relationship with food, and trying to teach myself to eat only when hungry and to stop when full. I do ok with eating when I am hungry, its the stopping that i struggle with. I like a big portion. And I like that portion to be of cheesy potatoes. Go figure.
I think that I will also struggle with drinking enough water. Don't ask me why, but I am often thirsty. I am thirsty right now, sitting, literally 5 feet from my fridge, with ice and water in the door, and I am not getting up to get a drink....Ok, I just got one. Phew. But that's going to be hard for me.
I also expect to have trouble at work. I work with all men, and do not plan on telling anyone at work what I am doing. they are not the most enlightened bunch and I don't feel the need to let them in on this part of my life.
So... this blog might be my best chance to vent and let go of the frustrations during the next 42 days. Tomorrow I will post the results of my measurements and weigh in, as well as the "before" pics.