Here are my notes on Week 4 of Full-Filled. I went through most of this while on vacation in Mexico, and feel like I've made great progress considering my usual behaviours here. Wow! The Renee Method really works!
*** Dig In: What are Your Triggers? ***
rank trigger situation
1. Being home alone, and hungry or bored or lonely, and continuously snacking.
2. Martini bar 'treats' at work and the encouragement to eat them, either as a reward or just to try them.
3. Dining out, particularly at All-You-Can-Eat restaurants.
rank trigger foods
1. anything chocolate
2. ice cream
3. carbs - crackers, etc.
*** Dig In: The Trigger Beneath the Trigger ***
Last overeating scenario: I ate a whole 100g dark chocolate bar while packing to go to Mexico.
- anxious about getting it all done and making it all fit in my carry-ons
- anxious about getting back to help my neighbour, and how long it would take to give that help
- anxious about my new friendship with my neighbour, not wanting to screw it up when she needed my help
- feeling rather alone, packing for a trip to visit my folks rather than going with someone I love / want to be with ("partner")
--> fear of being friendless and alone
--> fear of failure
--> fear of rejection
*** Dig In: What are Your Limiting Beliefs? ***
- That I am incapable of love
- that i am no good enough (at work stuff, maybe at relationship stuff too)
- that I am a superficial fraud, without depth of character
Where does this come from?
- years of failed relationships followed by self-judgement
- high performance standards, expect to be an expert in everything, must be self-sufficient
- "fact" that I have few deep relationships
What are the Limiting Beliefs?
- that I am not good enough
- that I am selfish
- that I don't try hard enough
- that I am a fraud, both at work and in relationships
- that I will always be lonely / alone
*** Dig In: Limiting Beliefs about Weight & Weight Release ***
Losing Weight is:
- hard - requires a lot of self-control and discipline [helplessness? hopelessness?]
- only easy if it is hyper-structured, counting all calories and exercising daily [again: helplessness? hopelessness?]
I'm Overweight Because:
- I don't have enough self-control to eat moderately (helpless / hopeless)
- I live an unstructured single life; lack of meal planning and lonely snacking
- I am not motivated to exercise consistently (at the gym) for reasons beyond weight loss
- I drink quite a bit at times and those calories add up
- I love sugar more than I respect myself, or so it seems (worthlessness)
*** Dig In: Question Your Old Beliefs ***
*I'm Not Good Enough *
- for what??? the org'n I'm contracting with is clamoring to keep me; why do I need to "play the consulting field" to feel good enough? Even if I got a contract elsewhere, would I then feel "good enough"?
- says who??? I have 3 university degrees, they can't all be wrong
- what is good enough??? Can I even define it? When would I ever get there if I don't let this go right here and now?
- if I'm not good enough, who is?
--> We are ALL good enough. Period.
"I love and accept you just the way you are"
*I'm Incapable of Love*
- I've been in love
- I've been able to receive love
- if I let go of judgement and criticism (since I'm now good enough and don't need to compete or compare), my relationships with others would be very positive
- if I'm good enough, I don't have to hide behind emotional walls; can trust, be vulnerable, openly loving
--> embrace forgiveness, gratitude, and self-respect.
*** Dig In: Creating Empowering Beliefs ***
[I'm not good enough] becomes [I am good enough at everything I take on]
- I am capable and successful
- I am in demand
- I have all the skills needed to do what I set out to do
- I can ask for help when need be
- I am positive and authentic
- I try my best, always
- I am imperfect just like everyone else, and that is OK.
- I love and accept myself exactly how I am
EFT: I'm not good enough - ranked 8/10
"Even though I'm not good enough, I still deeply and completely love and accept myself exactly how I am"
EFT: I'm incapable of love - ranked 7/10
"Even though I feel incapable of love, I still deeply and completely love and accept myself exactly how I am"
*this was waaay more emotionally charged than I thought it would be, left me in tears... bump it up to an 11/10!
EFT: I'm a superficial fraud 7/10
"Even though I feel like a superficial fraud, I still deeply and completely love and accept myself exactly how I am"
EFT: Judgement and criticism - 4/10
"Even though I harshly judge and criticize myself and others, I still deeply and completely love and accept myself exactly how I am"
EFT: Judgement again with stronger language - 6/10
"Even though I'm a judgmental bitch, I still deeply and completely love and accept myself exactly how I am"
I did the above late at night, sometimes getting quite emotionally charged, and then went to bed. I had a great sleep for about 5 hours before getting up feeling renewed and energized. We went to a buffet brunch and I did not eat beyond the point of being full (major coup for me!), so I feel pretty great about this, and plan to do more EFT as other issues / topics come to the forefront. I'm a believer!