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JESPAH
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Let Me Start a Fire With Your Spark

Monday, December 24, 2012

www.youtube.com/watch?v=
NWNKHi2joJE


I was thinking this could be an appropriate blog song, plus the quoted lyric is epic.

I know many are not reading. It is family time. It is celebration time. It is a time for letting go, a bit, as we begin to truly let go of the old year. And a lot of us end up letting go of our disciplines as well.

Ewps.

Let us, instead, let go of our anger. Let's kick resentment to the curb. Let's push slights and hurts and grudges away.

And let us leave ourselves with a far more positive essence within.

Perhaps, a case in pernt.

Mr. j and I were talking the other day. And we were describing what he eats for breakfast, versus what I eat. Now, there are days when he eats very healthfully indeed (oatmeal and the like). And there are days when his choices are, let's just say, less than optimal.

Yet he weighs less than me. And he is losing weight this way.

It angered me, truth be told. I wasn't angered at him (it's just his metabolism, after all). Rather, I was angry at the injustice of it all.

I had/have been good. I eat Cheerios and toast! Or I have a veggie omelet made with Pam! And that's just breakfast.

My lunches are usually better (in terms of health) than his are. My dinners are often the same, but when they vary, they are generally better.

I lift weights every damned day. He lifts much less often. He does walk more than I do, and he's faster. But apart from that, what gives?

And then I remembered. Or, rather, he reminded me.

* I am female.
* I am 50 years old.
* There is a history of all sorts of obesity, mainly on my mother's side but also for most of the women on my father's side as well.
* I have only been doing this for just under 5 years, and not over 45, like he has.
* And I am starting from far heavier, even now, and was starting for WAY heavier 5 years ago.

And so I remembered - life isn't fair, but there are still some reasons for the unevenness.

And I also remembered.

* I do the best to take care of myself.
* I walk even though I get discouraged.
* I race even though I am usually last.
* A lack of results is no excuse for screwing up and REALLY having a reason for no results.

Allow me to repeat that little tidbit.

A lack of results is no excuse for screwing up and REALLY having a reason for no results.

I swear, I should tattoo that on my forehead in mirror script.

And yanno what happened last week?

I ate my good breakfasts, and lunches, and dinners. I lifted. I walked. I even took a rare rest day.

And I lost over 7 pounds.

Now, at this stage of things, 7 pounds is generally a good 5 of water and salt. But I will take it gladly, and I will remind myself of what seems to be a universal truth, now and in all seasons -

Life ain't fair. But keep plugging anyway. And don't kick yourself for being imperfect. You are no angel, in your behaviors or your choices or your results.

So instead, you get to settle for being human.

And that's kinda cool.
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