Wednesday, December 19, 2012
Well I had a rude awakening this morning. I climbed on the scale and it read 270. Ugh!
So I am giving myself a reality check. Here it is.
I have not been eating healthy. I have been eating cheap comfort foods.
I have not been working out. I was doing really well just a few months ago, but have stopped completely. I didn't actually lose any weight then, but I felt better.
I have been eating more than I should. Time to watch portions and get snacking in check.
And the reason for all of this? I think I need to have a day of deep introspection to really form a clear conclusion about that. My gut instinct is that it is just plain laziness. But I wonder if it is not also a symptom of feeling so cut off from the world. I don't have anyone in my life keeping me in check and I don't have anyone in my life for whom it is worth taking care of myself. And that last statement probably is a strong reflection of my own self worth or lack there of, because shouldn't I want to take care of myself for me?
Any way, I have set myself a starter goal of 30 pounds and hope to reach that goal by February 18, my 28 birthday. And am going to start trying to slowly work some exercise back into my routine. The down side to that is that I have a little head cold that has settled in my chest, so cardio is going to be slow going until I fully recover. So I am going to aim for small bouts of activity and some strength training.
And hopefully I will never see that terrible number on the scale ever again.