This old gem popped into my head when I was thinking of a title for this blog post:
It's not about romance for me, it's about my commitment to myself. I miss being all fired up back in the Spring and early Summer. I wish I knew when apathy took over so I can recognize the early warning signs and either ask for help or head it off at the pass.
ANYHOW, while I have lost a little faith in myself, I haven't lost faith in Sparkpeople or the PEOPLE of Sparkpeople. I know that motivation, encouragement, sane weight loss and exercise information and other health information is right here. I'm smart enough to know that this is where I need to come to "try to get the feeling again."
My husband grew up in Sandy Hook, CT - he attended Sandy Hook Elementary School as did my sister-in-law and her daughter. My mother-in-law lives a mile from the school, and sadly, one of the little girls who was murdered lived on her street. This shooting as hit so close to home and the deep horror, sadness, anger, and outrage is a big swirly kaleidoscope of feelings that I'm having. I feel so much for the parents of the children and the families of the teachers who were gunned down so mercilessly and senselessly. I know all the talking heads on TV and "experts" will never be able to give us a "good" reason that this happened, or even any kind of reason other than "EVIL". What happened was pure evil, and the fact that it happened in such a sweet little town like my husband's home town is mind-boggling -- however anyone in ANY town would say this - even New York City, where crazy things happen all the time. "How can this happen here?" There will never be a real answer other than, "It can happen anywhere a disturbed person can get their hands on over-the-top lethal weapons".
I am participating in doing the 26 Random Acts of Kindness in honor of the 26 lives lost in Sandy Hook. I am praying and praying for peace, healing, love, and light for the families and for the whole world, for we all need it. I am not asking "Why", I am asking, "What can I do to help?" because even though I am lazy, not particularly practical, and undereducated, I can do something. I can help someone. I am hoping that by taking action I can fight for good in the world on the ground like a foot soldier.
I need to take care of me, too. How can I help heal what's broken if I'm not at 100%? I need a mission and this is mine, to be the good, to be the change I want to see. Maybe I can't change laws, but I can add positive acts in the world, and I can start with me.