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Needed to lose 80 LBS, Lost 50 Than gained 20 back :(

Wednesday, December 12, 2012

ACK! It's been forever since I blogged...for ever since I wanted to feel accountable for doing what I swore I wouldn't do...Put Weight BACK ON! :(

I started at SP weighing 210 LBS, I got down to 160 LBS, than started gaining it back...Why is no mystery, I gained it back because I reverted to my old eating habits and stopped working out. When I started my weight loss Journey I was SO focused and ALONE which to me didn't matter at the time. By alone, I mean on the journey not in life. I have a spouse, a spouse that could stand to lose some weight himself, yet he wasn't interested in a lifestyle change. FINE, I can't force someone to jump on board, but man it would have been a bazillion times easier if he was!

I cooked different meals, avoided the Diet Coke that I really, really was addicted to...watched him eat all the things I would normally eat and honestly missed eating. I like allot of people LOVE cakes, icecream, fried food etc. But I was focused on me...even when going out on the town I planned meals ahead at restaurants even choosing a place based on their menu.

Than it day I just got sick of doing it alone, sick of watching someone eat what I wanted...I felt deprived!

So 20 LBS came back on, I have been off eating right, drinking water, and exercise for 3months now probably. Actually I have been off of reality I denial! UGH! Depressing really! My Jeans that I didn't fit in for years and fit again and than were getting loose to the point I needed a belt were now getting tight! I knew it was just a matter of a couple weeks until they would no longer fit me again! :(

So here I am...3 days ago I once again found my focus eating awesome, and starting to get moving more. I am not keeping track of food, because I know my cals are probably close to where I want them and at this time it is more about fueling my body with good food and not crap than it is about anything else. I want to be healthy, I somewhere, somehow lost site of that!

I MUST and WILL do this..this is my life, my choice, my decision.

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I totally understand. I lost 30lbs, the got pregnant, and actually didn't gain the weight there, I gained it AFTER he was born because I was so happy to be able to eat again. I couldn't eat for about 7 mo, and I just wanted FOOD!!! So, here I am trying to get motivated again because I feel like I keep ending up here. Thanks for sharing your challenge, it helps to know that we're not alone. You can do it.
    1922 days ago
    Thanks for being so transparent. Good luck on this trip
    1924 days ago
    Thank you for your post. I have lost and gained many times. Each time without support. My husband said I should be eased he does not care if I am 200 or 120. I actually think I agree now. This is for me.this is my life. Each small victory will be mine. I celebrate your focusing on you again. This is so hard to do. I will keep an eye out for your posts. At the very least you have a cheering section. emoticon
    1924 days ago
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