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    BOXER-MOM   23,049
20,000-24,999 SparkPoints

Needed to lose 80 LBS, Lost 50 Than gained 20 back :(

Wednesday, December 12, 2012

ACK! It's been forever since I blogged...for ever since I wanted to feel accountable for doing what I swore I wouldn't do...Put Weight BACK ON! :(

I started at SP weighing 210 LBS, I got down to 160 LBS, than started gaining it back...Why is no mystery, I gained it back because I reverted to my old eating habits and stopped working out. When I started my weight loss Journey I was SO focused and ALONE which to me didn't matter at the time. By alone, I mean on the journey not in life. I have a spouse, a spouse that could stand to lose some weight himself, yet he wasn't interested in a lifestyle change. FINE, I can't force someone to jump on board, but man it would have been a bazillion times easier if he was!

I cooked different meals, avoided the Diet Coke that I really, really was addicted to...watched him eat all the things I would normally eat and honestly missed eating. I like allot of people LOVE cakes, icecream, fried food etc. But I was focused on me...even when going out on the town I planned meals ahead at restaurants even choosing a place based on their menu.

Than it day I just got sick of doing it alone, sick of watching someone eat what I wanted...I felt deprived!

So 20 LBS came back on, I have been off eating right, drinking water, and exercise for 3months now probably. Actually I have been off of reality I denial! UGH! Depressing really! My Jeans that I didn't fit in for years and fit again and than were getting loose to the point I needed a belt were now getting tight! I knew it was just a matter of a couple weeks until they would no longer fit me again! :(

So here I am...3 days ago I once again found my focus eating awesome, and starting to get moving more. I am not keeping track of food, because I know my cals are probably close to where I want them and at this time it is more about fueling my body with good food and not crap than it is about anything else. I want to be healthy, I somewhere, somehow lost site of that!

I MUST and WILL do this..this is my life, my choice, my decision.


Member Comments About This Blog Post:
MERCHRIS 12/14/2012 12:35PM

    I totally understand. I lost 30lbs, the got pregnant, and actually didn't gain the weight there, I gained it AFTER he was born because I was so happy to be able to eat again. I couldn't eat for about 7 mo, and I just wanted FOOD!!! So, here I am trying to get motivated again because I feel like I keep ending up here. Thanks for sharing your challenge, it helps to know that we're not alone. You can do it.

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DOUGLYE 12/13/2012 3:43AM

  Thanks for being so transparent. Good luck on this trip

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2GETMOVING 12/12/2012 7:45PM

  Thank you for your post. I have lost and gained many times. Each time without support. My husband said I should be eased he does not care if I am 200 or 120. I actually think I agree now. This is for me.this is my life. Each small victory will be mine. I celebrate your focusing on you again. This is so hard to do. I will keep an eye out for your posts. At the very least you have a cheering section. emoticon

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