Wednesday, December 12, 2012
Ever since I have had Hypothyroidism, I have a lot of mood swings. I used to never cry about anything but now I get angry, frustrated, cry, some days are good, etc. People in my family tell me to "just lighten up" as if it is the easiest thing to do. :O I don't expect them to understand fully because I don't even understand it fully. I just feel like my emotions take over. I am not good at hiding them either. It's really difficult. Some days, I feel like I can conquer my battles but some days I feel like it's impossible. Today is one of those impossible days. It's hard to describe unless you go through it. Of course, people go through much worse so I should just be grateful but it's not that simple. To make things worse, every singe one of my friends has some form of disordered eating. I think I may be distancing myself a bit from them because their excessive talk of dieting/weight/etc. just is not helpful. I hate these emotions. I hate that I feel like I can't control them. Even the way I am describing it sounds mild compared to the reality. It's like I am not the same person anymore & I really miss her because she was a really fun person.
I am also just so tired of this back and forth. One day I feel really positive. The next day I feel like crap. Sometimes it makes me feel crazy! I hate it.