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Day 4 , 5 & 6: Cookie Monster, Cookie Monster Returns, Bloater, Results of my Actions

Sunday, December 09, 2012

If you have been following me, you know that I tend to "forget" to blog when I am not doing something I should be doing. It is a silly pattern of mine, and yes, it is childish. I don't mean to, but I am trying to work on it. Which...is why I am posting today.

Day 4 was Thursday....Thursday I was emotional. Unhappy again back at my old job and on commission only now, so stressed about finances. What did I do? I had good intentions and put gym clothes on in the morning...Well, I ended up buying Creme Wafers (they are those wafer cookies that come in strawberry, vanilla and chocolate - yup, pure sugar) and eating 5.5 servings of the 9 servings in the package. Believe me, I was sad to do it, but I tracked every crumb/point that went into my mouth that day. After I did this, I didn't feel great and then had a waxy feeling on the roof of my mouth. Thank you creme filling. I tried to get back on track immediately, but because I had already spent 32 points on cookies, my day was shot. I did have a salad with lite dressing for dinner, so I didn't go totally crazy.

Enter Friday morning. Yup, the rest of the cookies were my breakfast. And, I was kind of a bum the rest of the day and did nothing (no activity). If you looked at my ActiveLink, you would have thought I was dead or sleeping. Total flat lined. But, I did count all my points and because of the cookies, I was at -24 for the week with my WPA. I really don't like seeing red in my tracker. It was inevitable that I would gain Saturday morning, not only because of the overage in points and the sedentary week (really, ActiveLink puts this right out there for you to see! It is quite fascinating since I thought I was a lot more active than I actually am. Chalk that up to "Duh," Kristi) but also because those cookies had a ton of SODIUM! I'm a bloater! I usually don't eat a lot of sodium (like popcorn, etc) two days before my WI's cause I know my body. Bloat.

Saturday...I went to my meeting and made myself get on that scale. "I" put those cookies in my mouth...time to step on that scale and acknowledge the results of my actions. Yup, up 1.6lbs. In looking at my WI's for 2012, I have been up and down the same 10 pounds since January! It's time to get off this roller coaster.

I did buy the new package of WW 360 items for two reasons.
1) The Success Book - 'cause it's obvious I need to have a little help since my success is not consistent nor truly success if I keep gaining it back within the month
2) The New Tracker - I do track on my phone, but I noticed when I track on paper, I almost always lose. This is not always true of my online/phone tracker. There is something about writing down your points physically that makes a difference for me. Yes, I know people are different and what I am learning is we all need to do what works for US, not others. So, I realized this is what works for me.

Now...the reason I am posting this is not to publicly shame myself, but to understand for me, that this is not going to be a straight line. I made some mistakes, now I need to learn from the mistakes and work on a few things...
1) Not turning to food when I am frustrated, stressed and trying to figure out how to not go broke...in other words, emotional.
2) Not allowing myself to be a bump on a log and being a couch potato
3) Writing down my food choices on a physical tracker rather than the online tracker

It is also important to recognize the things I did well, or better than before...
1) Tracker, even if the points went over, I tracked
2) WI - even though I know the scale was going to go up, I got on it
3) Got back on track right after my slip-ups, rather than taking it to binge-town

My New Years Resolution for 2013 is to learn from my mistakes and better myself by making small changes everyday.
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

RYDERB 12/17/2012 9:32AM

    I'm with you on the actually writing down, what I eat. It makes a big difference to hold it and see it. Flip pages back and forth. Yes tracking on SP is easy but almost too easy, as I don't ever look at any previous days. It takes too long to go back and forth.

I'm so proud of you for acknowledging your bad choices. We can't fix it, if we don't admit it's broken.
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OLIVIANIGHT 12/9/2012 5:31AM

    You're right, it takes a certain kind of bravery to track when you know you've overeaten and get on the scale when you know it will have gone up. Keep going and you'll get there : )

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