Saturday, December 08, 2012
I'm not handling this rejection very well. It's triggered my anxiety and depression and I'm having trouble shaking it. We have a great recreational league here, which most cities aren't as lucky to have, so I have gotten a lot of support from those girls and have been encouraged to keep skating with them. But I haven't gotten official feedback from the league about why I didn't make it, and I just don't understand why some people were drafted at all. It is really hard not to take it personally, or feel like people just don't like me for some reason. I'm trying to stay away from social media since that seems to add to my feelings of being shut out and it isn't helping me get through this gracefully. This is the second year in a row that I've been denied, although I made it farther in the process this year than I did before. All of the fresh meat that I trained with said that they were shocked I didn't make it, which is nice to hear, but it doesn't change anything. Nothing will. I am just confused and don't understand why it wasn't my turn this year.