Friday, December 07, 2012
Last night, my husband "drove me to drink" but, I know, that's NO EXCUSE ! I've been avoiding alcohol and have been doing very well with many alcohol-free days and an occasional drink some days. I'm 1/2 pound away from my short-term goal of 20 pounds lost which, I believe, has simply happened because of cutting back on the alcohol. I always ate a healthy diet. But last night, my husband was in a terrible mood from a couple nights of poor sleep, and "snapped" at me and "scolded" me when I really didn't do anything out of line. I felt he was being unfair and got a little teary-eyed. I asked our home-less friend to leave so that Johnny and I could talk. We had invited him to spend the night on our couch. Sorry - he'd have to go sleep in his tent in the woods. Don't worry - this is Florida and the weather is perfect right now. (High of 80 degrees in the afternoon and a low of 60 degrees at night). Well, then Johnny and I laid in bed and held hands and talked and he apologized for yelling at me, and everything was better but, unfortunately, I was really tempted to have a drink to calm down. I gave in. I drank a couple beers and played on the computer and then joined my husband back in bed. Now today, I'm not upset with HIM (he was just tired and cranky) but I am upset with MYSELF for giving in to the temptation to drink. I need to come up with something better to do when I'm upset instead of drinking. Prayer comes to mind. Next time I want to calm-down with alcohol, I'm going to try to remember to just PRAY until the urge passes. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me . . . . .