Thursday, December 06, 2012
... I was getting ready to go to my 25th college reunion, and I was upset because I felt like it was the most overweight I'd ever been in my life. To be honest with you, that's not actually true, but it's how I felt at the time.
None of my clothes fit, so I did a quick shopping trip to buy a few things I knew would be "temporary." I was shocked at how large a size I needed, and how expensive they were. Boy, do I wish I'd had your advice to go to a consignment shop then! Anyway, I got a few things to get me though the weekend, and although they did fit, they weren't flattering. The upside was that I had some clothes to wear that didn't look completely ratty. I got through the weekend, but didn't feel very good about myself.
A year later, I couldn't fit into those clothes anymore. You guessed it: they were too small. Those "temporary" clothes were temporary for all the wrong reasons.
Flash forward to this week's weigh-in. The last time the scale registered 162, I was despondent, and determined to lose weight right away. You know how that ended: I didn't.
This time, just yesterday, when the scale registered 162 -- the exact same number, mind you -- I was delighted. Why? Because now the needle is headed in the right direction, steadily and consistently. Unlike 2 years ago, I don't fear gaining more weight right now. In fact, it is just the opposite. I know I won't gain weight right now. My body is feeling clean and energetic, and I think somehow it WANTS to let go of those extra pounds that slow me down and make my joints hurt. My habits are good, really good. Healthy choices I used to have to think about are becoming increasingly automatic. There is no way I will gain back any of that weight.
Out of curiosity, I tried on those "temporary" clothes of 2 years ago -- and they fit! They still aren't very flattering, but they look clean and they do fit. Again, I was delighted and felt it as a success. Wearing those (frankly, ugly) clothes again is an indicator that I'm on the right track, headed in the right direction, with SP and momentum on my side.
By next year, I vow, those temporary clothes will be out of my life forever ... but this time for the right reasons.
Onward to Month 2!