Between starting a new job, going through an eviction, having to find a new place, having to unpack, having to continue homeschooling my oldest son, and edit sessions for my photography business things have been not so great as far as fitness is concerned. Plus, November was hard to get through as that would have been the month I was due so there was a little more emotional eating than there probably should have been. I still sometimes don't feel like I can get past the loss of our Jace. It hurts more than I could ever put into words, even though we were early along in the pregnancy when it happened. Recently I started to have dreams of being pregnant again, and honestly that pain is almost equal when I wake up and realize it's not true. I know I need to get my health back on track first though. I just have to find out where my dedication went. Maybe I just really need to get addicted to the gym again. I wonder how fast the weight will come off if I actually do dedicate myself to it again.