Sunday, December 02, 2012
If you enter the link, Jordin Sparks' video will come up...I've been listening to this song over and over the last few days. For some reason it's really making sense right now. I want so much to lose this weight, but I'm having motivation issues. I want so much to get into nursing school, but I'm scared. Why am I dragging my feet lately?
Here's my goals for the next month. Yes, I know that it's going to be a tough month...my birthday is on the 10th, and Christmas and New Years follow shortly after. I just need to remember to take small baby steps with this month and work harder next month.
1. Drink more water. I've gotten really lax about this, and I know it. My body knows it too. My lips are constantly chapped and my muscles are super achy. Time to get back on track.
2. Keep with walking as much as possible...even getting up and taking extra walks during the workday when I can. I start a desk job on the 17th, so I'm a little worried about this one, but I just have to make it a priority.
3. Get the damn candies and sweets out of my house! I am having such a battle with the bag of Halloween candy that my kids got this year...butterfingers...I'm going to have to throw them away when the kids are at school one day and play stupid when they ask where they are.
4. Make a meal plan for the week. When I start this new job, eating breakfast at home is going to be even more important. There's a cafeteria at work, but they cook everything with grease and butter. I'm also going to have to start bringing lunch to work since their idea of a salad is old yellowing iceberg lettuce and two small tomato slices...ugh.
5. Work on giving myself some "me" time. Things are better yet worse with the bf, and I'm starting to have more self esteem issues because of it. I need to make myself a priority. I have to get a whole new wardrobe for this new job (slacks instead of scrubs), and I'm not at a point where shopping for clothes is fun for me. I just need to keep telling myself that yes, there are clothes that will look okay on me. And just because I buy new clothes doesn't mean I have to stay the same weight to fit into those clothes. I'm worth losing the weight.
6. Get through Christmas with at least some money still in my checking account. It happens every year. I end up overspending on my children because I don't want to be the "bad mother." I have three presents (one for each person in my little family) all ready to be wrapped, but I always feel like there should be more. I need to figure out what the bf and I are giving to our parents, too...pretty sure he's not even going to think about them, but I feel it's my responsibility to make sure his mom gets something (even though she doesn't care for me...maybe I'm trying too hard on this one).
7. Figure out what I'm going to do about school. It's getting to that point where I really need to decide what the heck I'm doing with my life. I have all my pre-req's done, but they're going to go to waste if I don't get going on nursing school.
8. Figure out if I still want to be part of the Pink Vikings next year. Do I need to move on, or just take a break from this whole challenge thing? Not really sure what to do about this one, and certainly don't want to offend anyone on my team. This year was my first challenge, and I just don't know if this was really where I needed to be. (Members of Pink Vikings, please don't take this wrong. This is my personal battle, really has nothing to do with the group as a whole. This is just something I needed to put down to work through.)
9. Last but not least, find another workout buddy. With me changing jobs, the time that I can go to work out is not going to be the same. I need to find someone willing to go with me that will be in the same category as me (ie. just starting out). Something to work on...but maybe I just need to try going by myself.
anyhow, this is my list so far. I realize that I'm a work in progress, and I know that I mess up everyday with this lifestyle change, but that's okay. I may never be perfect. I'm doing the best I can with what I have right now, and that's enough for now.