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    JAXMOMMY   149,303
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Update On my Life & GoodNews Not So Good For MIL

Saturday, December 01, 2012

Well, many of you know that my MIL had a procedure done on Friday called an ablation or ablasion.... Sorry, don't know how to spell it. She has A-fib and this procedure was to "kill" part of her heart in order to put it in and keep it in rhythm. She was in surgery all day yesterday having the procedure done and it all seemed good. She woke up complaining which told us all was fine. But, today her heart returned to A-fib. I don't know if it can happen, but I suspect she may hav caused it to happen by her negative attitude and complaining and stress. Not sure, but I feel it has something to do with it all. Anyhow, she has to stay in hospital and have a pacemaker put in on Monday. She is all tore up about the pacemaker. She doesn't want something implanted and now her body will depend on a machine and what if the machine fails and blah, blah, blah.... You get her picture. Personally, I don't see what the problem is with getting a pacemaker. Yes, it is invasive, but if it is going to keep you alive, then grin and bear it. I do know as a therapist that research supports that people who have heart conditions heal quicker and fare better with positive attitudes. Research also shows that people with terminal cancer live longer with a positive attitude. But, she is who she is and she will be 70 a week from today, so.... I can't help it. Her negativity irritates me.

I had another night of 0 sleep last night. I have no idea what is going on. I am tired. Even very tired and yet I can't seem to fall asleep. Nothing is weighing on my mind. I just can't sleep. My husband said I am a rollercoaster sleeper. Up all night one night and down, dead to the world the next. Last night I even took a pain pil b/c my shoulder was killing me and it didn't put me out as usual. The pain subsided, so that wasn't keeping me awake. I'm at a loss on this one.

I did really good on exercise this past week. I didn't skip 1 single day and had only 1 day with less than 60 minutes. I am doing some pilates now and loving it! This coming week I will be dancing twice a week in belly dance classes again. Loving that. I lost a little weight this week, but not much. Wish all this exercise would work better for me!

I'm really tired due to not sleeping. But, now I am worried about my dad. He is getting very, very forgetful. He has a family history of mini-strokes, major strokes and a brain tumor. But, if you ask him to get tested or talk to his doctor he gets angry. He is a young man, good looking and vibrant, but his memory is bad. I've noticed it go downhill over the past 2 years. At first I attributed it to delayed grief from my brother and sister dying in 2004. Then it got worse, or seemed to, when he retired. Otherwise he is healthy, but the memory is bad and not in just a person aging sort of way.

Worrying doesn't do anyone any good, so I try to figure out how to get him to seek help and let him know that whatever is going on he has no reason to feel ashamed. I think it is his pride getting in the way. Plus, he is the primary caregiver to my mom and I think not only pride, but fear plays a part too. But, if he does have early onset alzheimer's there are medications to help.

I feel like I am just blabbing on here. Sorry! Other than exhaustion, I feel good! Had my nails done today in Phat Santa on my toes and holly berries and leaves on my ring fingers. Feeling festive. Almost all of my christmas gifts came in the mail today, so I can start wrapping! I love giving gifts! It is how I show love.

Well, need to eat and then probably bed for me! So freaking tired!
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

AUNTKATHY 12/7/2012 7:30AM

    I really agree with the positive attitude and having an effect on outcomes. I also understand about your parents. Mine are 75 and 76. I am racing against the clock to give them a grandbaby, although they already have five from my brother!
I have also had periods of NOT sleeping, I believe journaling to a good outlet. I hope that you get a good rest soon as it does wear and tear your body a lot! Take care and know I will be praying for you and your family.

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NEWNAC304 12/3/2012 3:45PM

    I hope you get so e sleep soon.

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JOANNKW 12/3/2012 3:29PM

    (((Melissa))) I'm thinking the sleep problem is due to stress. You have a bunch of stressful things going on in your life.

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FUSIONFITNESS3 12/1/2012 11:50PM

    Hope you get some deep restorative sleep tonight. It's so important to our health and we take it so for granted until we are without it. Unfortunate what you MIL is experiencing. Keep yourself positive despite the negative you experience around you. I know it can be a challenge when we're around negative people but negativity can sure weigh a person down both literally and figuratively.
Maria

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MICHELLE_391 12/1/2012 11:39PM

    Sometimes it helps just to get it all out. I'm glad you posted this blog, but sorry you are having to go through all of this.

Congratulations on doing so well with your fitness!

There is a Spark group for people having problems with sleeping. I found some very good tips in there and the team helped me a LOT when I was going through a very stressful time.

You could be right about MIL's negative attitude. But think for a moment - is there anything you can do to change it? Probably not. I hope you have ways of not letting her attitude get to you!

emoticon

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BIGPAWSUP 12/1/2012 10:50PM

    Good luck getting some sleep. I'm a bit worried about you.

You MIL will be fine with the pacemaker. Don't let her stress you!

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ROXYZMOM 12/1/2012 10:05PM

    What time are you exercising? Is it late in the day? That may be keeping you up. Have you tried a hot shower before bed? That always helps me sleep.

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HI-NRG 12/1/2012 9:00PM

    Maybe we should start a team for "How to Grow Old Gracefully". I'm always saying I don't want to go down the path that my parents did, but really, will I be any different? I don't think there really is an answer however, I am hoping that if we constantly talk about it, as we do here, it will help keep us aware of what's around us. Don't know if I'm making any sense here.

Hope you get some sleep soon.
-donna

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LESSOFMOORE 12/1/2012 7:52PM

    Dear Twin,

You know I have always agreed with you about your MIL. We will never understand these people who don't want to help themselves. As for your dad, it would be nice if he goes to the doctor for routine check-ups. How old is he? As you said there might be drugs that can help him. Hugs and sleep tight!

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DLDMIL 12/1/2012 7:22PM

    Sorry to hear about your famlies health issues. My Dad has a pacemaker and still has A-Fib. After he retired his health has really gone down hill, including his memory, he is 77 and is being tested this week for possibly a stroke. Apparently one night he couldn't get up, but failed to tell my Mom about it until several days later. It is very hard to have our parents and in-laws getting to this stage of life. Hang in there and try to get some sleep. emoticon

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