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Feeling Not Good Enough

Saturday, December 01, 2012

It's funny, I was just listening to the first episode, "Feeling Not Good Enough." when a spark friend asked me for the link. I feel very connected to her, over time and space. And my answer to her just kept getting longer & longer, so I decided to blog about it, since maybe you would get something out of it, too.

It's about how the voice in your head tells you you're not good enough, and when you work hard and accomplish great things, that self-judging voice raises the bar even higher. So that no matter what you do, you're never good enough. Like if you found a cure for cancer, it would say why didn't you find it sooner? So that the definition of good enough is like a box that keeps getting smaller, so that you never fit in it.

So, if you step into the duality, the not-good-enough box, it's roomier, because it fits all the things that don't fit into the good-enough box.

But step away, and you'll see that they're both just boxes. They're narrow definitions. You're a whole lot more complex than these boxes. It's like the boxes are the wrong.

Have you ever heard the question, "What is the sound of one hand clapping?" Your mind goes to solving it, thinking about the answer. But the answer is that the question is wrong. It's a stupid question. Like what is the sound of chocolate? What does a rainbow smell like?

So, too is the question "What is good enough?" a wrong question. Just go enjoy your life. Change the question to "How can I have a good relationship with someone today?"

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Very powerful blog! Thank you for posting your thoughts publicly - I am definitely going to listen to this podcast now. I've been struggling with good enough lately - thank you for sharing!

    1872 days ago
    1874 days ago
  • CARRIE1948
    Doesn't everyone have that voice in their head? May have to check out the podcast.
    1877 days ago
    I totally agree. Life is too short to waste in ruing our perceived imperfections.
    1878 days ago
    Well said.
    1878 days ago
    This is a GREAT blog post. Thank you.

    PS. I couldn't get to the itunes link, but this entire series of podcasts can be found free at:

    1878 days ago

    Comment edited on: 12/1/2012 12:28:42 PM
    emoticon Well said!

    Just do it! says Nike.

    I learned somewhere along the way, to get rid of a negative 'tape' just think of something else. It sounds easy. And it is easy. count sheep, say the ABS's backwards--or forwards, count to 1000, say a kid's poem, whatever. Your mind actually can't think of 2 things at once.

    1878 days ago
  • LIS193
    Great blog! Those darn voices in our heads... perfection is unattainable and we can only do the best we can. Most times good enough is exactly that: good enough!
    Thank you for the the link to podcast.
    1878 days ago
  • LE7_1234
    I was really glad to read this, because I was worried that after everything you've accomplished lately, you were going to say you felt not good enough!!

    You're amazing. :-)
    1878 days ago
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