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Saturday, December 01, 2012

Change. This is, perhaps, the most feared 6 letter word in the dictionary. Change is not something we, as humans, do easily. Habits get ingrained, comfort zones get reached, and "change" makes us take paths that are new, different, and sometimes scary. My life is full of "change" right now, and it's making me take stock, today.........a rather auspicious day in that it's a Saturday, and it's the first day of a new month.

I've left the place I've been employed, for all but 3 months of the last 8 years, for good. I've held various positions within that organization over those years, and truly care about many of the people that are left there. Finances being what they are, however, and promises made back in March by one set of administrators, that were broken in August by another set, led me to have to seek employment elsewhere. The job I ended up being fortunate enough to be offered not only allows me to work in the field that I love, but I'll be working with veterans - people for whom I have the utmost respect - AND at a substantially higher pay rate! Digging out of the financial hole I ended up in because of those broken promises mentioned earlier is now a distinct possibility! Change #1.

With those financial issues, along came issues with DS.............very unexpected ones. He will always be the child that learns things the hard way, and I've been "tapering off", since September, the support I've given him financially over the years. He's been forewarned appropriately that, as of today, the tapering is done, and the financial support as he's come to know it, ends. There will always be the occasional "Mom can you" from both of my kids.......... but it's make it or break it time with DS. Tough love is tougher on us than it is on them, no matter what age they are. Change #2.

With a new job also comes a new schedule and a new way of having to do things. I will no longer be working from home...........something that I've done for 8 years. I've become the chief cook-laundry person-homemaker-gardener-keep
er of the everything in that 8 years and some of that is going to have to change. I am no longer the Superwoman that the 80's declared we ought to be......................and I'm proud of it! I will not fall into the trap of being the "do-er" and not having any time for myself. Learning to let go..............change #3.

How does that tie into what I've *not* done weight-wise this past BLC round, you ask? I've had to look at a whole lot of things to answer that question..................and the common denominator I've discovered is that I still react to stress, and I still allow that stress/emotional eating to rule my brain. With all the things that are changing.......... I've decided I need to take a different journey in this adventure of weight "loss". I cannot go that journey alone, so I will continue to take it with my Amber Amazon Warriors.............without them, I'd have zoomed way beyond what I weigh now. I've managed somehow not to eat my way beyond the 10 lb. range I seem to keep myself in these days. No - this new journey is one that will have to take me to a different mindset on "weight loss" vs. "weight management". I'm formulating that plan today - on paper - as I take the desperately needed "me" time I have available to me. Change #4.

One. Day. At. A. Time.

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  • 1EMMA2011
    Yes Yes Yes!

    At some point the children need to figure this life out for themselves. Good for you for leaving your job. They should have respected you more!

    Hang in there and good for you for making these changes!

    1895 days ago
  • ELIZ181
    Those are some great changes you are looking at and I know you will do great.

    Yes for most change is a scary thing but if you think of it as an adventure it makes it so much better. I long ago learned to embrace change as a good thing as long as it isn't a change just for a change but actually has a purpose. You not only will learn about new thing, or a new way to do something you will learn about yourself as well
    1905 days ago
    Ch-ch-ch-changes! ;-) You are making some wonderfully positive strides - you should feel proud of yourself!! Everything sounds great - I LOVE your background: I'm gonna make the rest of my life, the best of my life. I think you are well on your way!!
    ~ Christa
    1905 days ago
    With all the Changes that you have had and are still is no wonder that 'weight loss' or 'weight management' gets a little lost in all that shuffle....and unfortunately least a majority of women...still put themselves 'last'....i am one of those women!
    But we have to start realizing that it is so very important to take care of ourselves first..before we try and take care of any and everyone else. But of course that is easier said then done...because you are so right...our age group was taught that we are and can be 'Superwomen'! are on the right track...staying with the team is a good start....and i am positive that once you have found a routine in your new job you will master the Weight management and /or weight loss just fine. emoticon emoticon
    One day at a time emoticon emoticon

    P.S. Totally agree 'Tough Love' (whoever started that?) tougher on us then it may be on our kids...i can relate! Hang in there though....there is a light at the end of that tunnel. emoticon
    1906 days ago
    Great blog! I'm here for you if you need additional support, even if you just want to vent.

    Have a great day!

    1906 days ago
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